What I Wanted
by Tobiwolf13
Summary: In the comics, a Rogues' Gallery of villains have tried to neutralize Superman. In the Smallville 'verse all it took was one lone girl...
1. Chapter 1

Pairing: Clana (no really, not high, I swear) and Chimmy with Chlark and Chlana friendship

Special thanks to EllyF who let me borrow her incarnation of Lana from her far superior fic "What I've Done."

In the comics, a rogues' gallery of aliens, gangs, and an evil meglomaniacal businessman have all tried their hand at eliminating Superman. In SV, all it took was one lone girl...

What I Wanted  
Part One - Grounded

There've been a lot of hard things that I had to get through in my life---my parents' death, my aunt abandoning me, being trapped in a loveless marriage---but I think faking my death was the hardest thing that's ever happened to me. It's funny. I never really thought about what Chloe went through. I just went to Paris one summer and within days of my return, Chloe was back as if her safe house had never exploded and there'd never been a funeral. Maybe it hadn't been as real to me, since I hadn't been able to make it back from Paris for the service. I don't know. What I do know is that it never occurred to me how crushingly lonely it would be to be dead.

I spent the last six months hiding out in Nice, safe and secure on Lionel's dime, of course, but it was like being in exile. Hell, it was exile. Beautiful, yes. Scenic, sure. But empty above everything else. I'd missed Chloe and Lois, even if I hadn't seen them much in the last few months of my marriage except under dire circumstances. I think the last time Lois had come around had been to bring me an extra large bouquet at Smallville Medical after I'd been shot, and the last time I'd seen Chloe, I'd been busy begging her not to tell Clark anything about my deal with Lionel.

I seriously doubted that she'd listened. Those two had never been able to keep anything from one another. Looking back on it, I should have figured it out earlier that she'd known. I still wonder how long she had. Surely she hadn't been in on the big alien secret since eighth grade. She'd been as frustrated with Clark's mood swings and unexplained disappearances as I was at least as late as our junior year of high school. And I knew Chloe. She was one of the worst actresses I'd ever met. Every thought and emotion she'd ever had was always written across her face. There were Vegas billboards harder to decode than she.

Even back in the beginning of freshman year when I'd been too wrapped up in cheerleading and Whitney to really realize that there was a whole broad world that didn't revolve around me or Crows Football, I'd noticed her reaction to Clark. Even in Smallville, Kansas, high schools are large enough that kids fall through the cracks, but the Chloe-Clark-Pete group had always been easy to spot. They all stuck out: the too tall kid more skittish than Bambi, the city girl with all the disdain she could muster for small town living (and the outrageous hairstyle to match), and one of the few African American kids in town.

Conspicuous even then, and the way she'd looked at Clark----Hell, the way she still looked at Clark---even Whitney had made a joke or two about what went on late night at The Torch.

Deep down, I'd always been jealous of her. Clark worshipped me, and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't nice because being adored like that is amazing, but he relied on and trusted her.

He'd told her first, after all, hadn't he?

And now I was back in Metropolis, I'd come home, and nothing was as I'd left it. I'd waited until after the trial was finished before I came home. Lionel had used his pull with the Metropolis D.A.'s office to put the best prosecutor on Lex's case. Even with the football-sized legal defense team Lex had recruited, it hadn't been enough. He was safe behind bars and I was safe from him. He wouldn't be touching me or my body for the rest of his life. I wanted to feel guilty about locking him away for a crime he hadn't committed, but I felt nothing but relief. Besides, from what Lionel had told me, Lex was guilty of far worse things, which included Tuskegee and Nuremburg-sized crimes against humanity. Well, more or less humanity. Even now, I'm not quite sure what to think about meteor mutants. I've met a few, like Tobias and Cyrus, who were genuinely good people, but most are supremely dangerous. I can't quite fault Lex for wanting to protect the rest of us from them. I've been stalked too many times to feel completely comfortable around any of the meteor freaks.

Honestly, I'm not quite sure how I feel about Clark.

I've only been home a few weeks. I'd come straight back to Metropolis and been secreted away in Lionel's penthouse. After all, I couldn't exactly go out on the town as "Lana Lang." My ex-father-in-law, as attentive as always, had arranged for an expert makeover to make sure the girl I was now couldn't be traced back to the murdered wife of Metropolis's most notorious son. I'd had my nose nip and tucked, changing the shape of it quite a bit, and my hair dyed a bright red. Blue contacts hid my eyes, but I'd stopped short of having a surgeon change them. Maybe it was a mistake, but I couldn't change who I was that completely. At night, even with the new nose and the Julianne Moore hair, I could still take out my contacts and see myself.

Whoever that was supposed to be.

After the new Lana Lang---renamed Lori Lemaris on all my official documents—had healed and was visitor ready, I'd demanded to see Clark and Chloe. There'd been weeping and hugs all around and, surprisingly, more than a few angry glares from Chloe. I could have dragged her into my bedroom to prod her further about her anger, but I could guess where both her and Clark's indignation came from. Let them be upset about what I'd done to Lex. He'd never hurt them had he? And yeah, I'm sorry they had to go through mourning my death, but I was back now and all of that pain and chaos was behind us.

The world had changed a lot since I'd been gone and not just with the shift in the power behind Luthorcorp. Martha was now a United States senator and only came back to Kansas once every two weeks. Chloe and Lois had moved to Metropolis (without Lex, Luthorcorp had sold off The Talon and the cousins had had to find another apartment). They'd shared an apartment initially but just a month ago, Jimmy'd asked Chloe to move in and she'd agreed. Similarly, Clark, urged on by his mother and his best friend, had started classes back at Met U and was living in an apartment just off campus. There was nothing tying any of us to Smallville anymore.

I didn't know how to feel about that either. I hated Smallville in a lot of ways. It was where my family had been shattered, where Lex had manipulated me and violated my body, where nothing but pain had rained from the sky for decades. At the same time, it was where I was the small town princess. Where everyone knew my story and deferred to me. Some days I hated being singled out, but like with Clark and his near fanatical worship of me, at the same time, I think I craved being the center of attention.

It hadn't been twenty-four hours after our reunion before Clark had asked me to move in with him. Even though part of me didn't want to trade the luxury of the penthouse for a cramped apartment, most of me was overjoyed. This was what I'd wanted for so incredibly long. I'd loved Clark for years, but had been blinded by Lex and left confused by Clark's own laundry list of lies. Now, however, there was nothing between us. Finally, he was laid bare for me and I could love him.

So I'd said yes.

And we'd been in the honeymoon period for the first two weeks, until early this morning. It was weird getting used to sleeping with another person. Lex and I hadn't shared a bed even after we'd been married—at my insistence, obviously---and Clark and I had only slept together twice. After he'd been shot, he'd refused to spend the night over at the dorms, even on nights when Chloe was buried deep in research down at the Planet and we'd been sure to have a night alone. In fact, he always stared over at the bed when I offered a space up to him like it was a coiled cobra ready to strike him. Put another way, my desk chair got a lot of use that semester we'd dated. It had crushed me then, his lack of interest in me that way because I'd been convinced that I'd done something wrong, that I'd been terrible. After all, Jason hadn't wanted to sleep with me either. Part of that pain and rejection had definitely been part of the reason for me breaking up with him after Mr. Kent's death.

Of course, I knew now he'd held off because he'd been afraid he'd crush me, which even now was a distinct possibility. I'll never tell him, but the first night in the Metropolis apartment, I didn't sleep at all. I'd seen him rip steel in half; it gave me all these nightmare scenarios about what he could accidentally do to me.

But he hadn't. He'd been surprisingly gentle and after that I'd relaxed. It still didn't make the sensation of sharing a bed any weirder. It's just that superpowers or not, Clark's a pretty big guy and I was just getting comfortable with feeling of sleeping with his arms wrapped around me and of being crowded onto a corner of the mattress. On a side note, it's a great thing that he's a naturally early waker because, honestly, it's not possible to get untangled from him when he's asleep. I'd tried the second night to get up to go to the bathroom and come to the sad realization that bear traps had more give. At the same time, though, I felt so secure and safe, just like I had nestled in between my parents all those years ago at the drive in.

It was nice.

Correction, it had been nice until about five minutes ago. That's when I woke up and tried rolling over just a little. It was still dark outside----and apparently too early for a farmboy that no longer had cows to feed---and he was still sleeping, hair tousled and snores escaping his throat (who knew aliens snored?). Sighing, I rolled my eyes and glanced to the clock. Correction, I would have glanced at the clock.

Instead I was looking at the curtain rod and it was eye level.

I took a deep breath and arched my neck to the side as far as it would go. Sure enough, we were floating---okay, he was floating, the only thing keeping me from crashing back down to the bed were his arms wrapped around my stomach---about four feet off the mattress.

"Clark?"

He groaned and mumbled, "Five more minutes, mom."

Oh come on. It's not like he hadn't had to wake up early all the time back at the farm. "Clark?" I said, noticing the shrill tone creeping into my voice. I was trying to stay calm, but I'd only defied gravity once before and memories of Zod weren't exactly Zen.

"Lana, I can tell right now it's still dark outside and I don't have to be up until eight for my morning classes. Come on."

"Clark!" I shrieked. Okay, so maybe some parts of the alien thing were going to freak me out, but I didn't expect to find myself floating either.

His eyes snapped open and he had time to glance around and realize what he'd done before we both crashed down onto the bed. He'd been fast enough to twist under me so that I didn't feel the brunt of the impact. Still, I had the wind knocked out of me from landing on Clark's steel stomach. The bed shuddered underneath us and the four legs wavered, finally splintering and sending the mattress crashing to the ground.

My heart was racing so fast in my chest that I thought I might have a heart attack right then and there. I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself, but even as I drew in the first breath, I found myself alone on the mattress. Clark had blurred across the room and was backed into a corner. His eyes were wide and I could tell he was almost as freaked out as I was.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry." He said, beginning to pace back and forth. He was going a little faster than a human could have and I was getting a little dizzy from following the rapid back and forth movement.

I took another deep breath and tried to get my heart to stop its frantic beating. "I know." That was all I could say for the moment. Not "It's alright" or "I forgive you." I wasn't interested in soothing him right then. I'm sorry. I could have been hurt with that little stunt, and anything that brought back memories of being captured by Zod seriously frightened me.

Maybe Clark frightened me a little.

He slowed his pacing and blurred back to me and I couldn't stop the little yelp that escaped my lips, and I tried to ignore the crestfallen look on his face from my flinching. He stopped his arm in mid-reach and let it drop to his side. "I…I really am sorry."

"I know." I waited for him to speak again, to understand that I wasn't offering absolution.

"I…I really haven't done that for a few years. I almost forgot that I could."

I sighed, finally feeling my heart slow back to its normal pace. "Zod could fly."

"Yeah, so I noticed when he was dragging me half way across Kansas," Clark said dryly. "I can't actually fly." He paused for a second and made a face to himself, and I got that familiar sinking feeling that he was holding something back from me.

"You can't?" I asked, trying desperately to keep the edge out of my voice.

He shook his head. "No, but sometimes when I'm unconscious…' He trailed off and waved his hand as if saying "floating" was like cursing.

"Alright," I said, finally ready to reach out to him and placing my hand gently on his shoulder. "Is there any way that you can get control of this?" I wanted to say "make it go away," but I figured from what he told me that his powers were pretty much permanent.

"Well, with a new ability I have to practice it before I can get full control over it. I have class today and an interview with Perry White in order to get an internship at the Planet, but tomorrow's a Saturday and maybe we could go out to the back forty and I could practice then."

"'We?' Clark, I hate to tell you this, but I don't know anything about flying so I don't think I'd be very much help." I also didn't want to add that I really didn't want to see him flying. Most days, it was easy enough to just pretend that Clark was human, and I preferred it that way. Watching him learn to fly would be a big reminder that he was anything but normal.

His voice wavered just a bit as he replied. "It's okay. I'll just ask Chloe to help out with it. She's really good about being a powers coach, anyway, but we should all go out and make a day of it. It would be fun. Picnic and everything."

"I can't." I lied. "I have some last minute arrangements to make with Lionel, but I might be able to make it to the farm later in the afternoon." I gave him my largest smile and stood on tip-toe to give him a peck on the cheek. "I'm sure the two of you will be fine without me."

I had to chase down the jealousy bubbling out of my stomach when I thought about him and Chloe together. Not that I felt threatened by her. She had Jimmy after all and I knew that Clark loved me. It's just that I sort of hated that she was going to be sharing something with Clark that I wouldn't be. Of course, Chloe could have the extraterrestrial side. I'd just keep the Clark I'd grown up with.

He smiled hesitantly. "Yeah, we'll be fine, no worries." He reached out and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. Then he leaned down and gave me a kiss on the top of my head. "Well that pretty much destroyed the bed." He sighed. "I think the springs are still intact, and the sofa in the living room is pretty comfy. I'll just be out there if you need me, 'k?"

I smiled and tilted my head up to give him a kiss on the lips. That was so sweet of him, just automatically understanding that I'd need my space. "Sure, see you in a few hours."

There was a breeze and the next second I was alone in the room and Clark's pillow and the spare quilt was gone. He was gone.

I spent the Saturday in Metropolis going out to lunch with Lionel. I didn't know many people in the city anymore. None of the rich and powerful were on my social calendar now. After all, I was back to being a small town and it would take time to build up a new network of friends. I was hoping things would get easier once I started back to Met U for summer session classes.

Still, I couldn't avoid going out to the farm forever, so I found myself tromping through the thicket of forest in the back forty, scanning the sky for Clark. And that sounds so weird even to me. Eventually, I came to a clearing and found Chloe standing in the center of it, her neck arched toward the sky. Apparently practice was going well.

"Lana! Hey, how was Metropolis. Did you sort out the rest of your legal stuff with Lionel?" Her lips were turned down into the slightest of frowns and I had this moment of panic where she'd figured out that I'd been lying. Of course, it might make sense that Lionel had ratted me out. He and Chloe had been allies long before I'd ever met him.

Then her expression changed and her usual bright smile returned to her face. "So I can assume that 'Lori Lemaris' is ready to assume her rightful place as a tax-paying citizen and everything?"

I smiled back and gave a small nod. "Everything is set up and airtight. It's nice to know people who know people."

"Nothing like relying on a Luthor to find an inside track on the underhanded." Chloe deadpanned. "Still, it's kind of a shame, you missed all the action. There was a lot of pushing Clark out of the loft window before we realized the baby bird approach wasn't going to work."

"Is he okay?"

"Naturally, but there's a huge ditch from where he ate it."

"That's nice." I offered, not really sure what the proper response was.

Chloe ignored the awkwardness and continued on in that rapid fire way she had. There are a lot of days that I think she missed her calling to be a lawyer. There isn't anyone I know who can survive an onslaught from fast-talking Chloe. That much intensity wore anyone out. "So, anyway, we hit the back forty and moved on to what I guess I'd like to call the Peter Pan method---which I so should have seen coming---I mean, happy thoughts, much? If his heat vision is all hormone activated, it totally figures that flying's the same way." She shook her head. "Dating on Krypton must have been an extreme sport."

Wait, my brain just caught up with the rest of her rant. "Hormone what?"

"Yeah, the heat vision thing. It's totally sexual." Chloe grinned and made the motion of a lock turning in front of her lips. "But you didn't hear that one from me."

"Where else would I have heard it from?"

She shrugged. "Okay, just try not to let him in on the joke. He's excellent with controlling that one, as far as I know, although when he had that whole memory wipe back senior year, he seemed extra excited to see you." She giggled.

I blinked. Chloe's not a giggler, but apparently she found most of Clark's powers amusing. Why didn't it surprise me that Chloe would find humor in alien abilities that had the potential to lay waste to almost anything? There were some days when I believed that exposure to Smallville seriously screwed with someone's perception of normal.

"Huh. I won't." I reached back and pulled my hair up into a scrunchee. "So, it's going well?"

She shrugged. "Pretty good. He's not great with the landings, but considering the way that Clark just barrels into things, I can't say that I'm surprised."

"So, will he be coming back any time soon?"

"One sec," Chloe said, bringing her hands to cup around her mouth. Then she yelled, "Hey Clark! Lana's here." She turned back to me and shook her head. "Sorry about the yelling, he could probably hear me if I whispered, but I still can't adjust to that scary level of hearing. I mean, he's probably thousands of feet up by now."

"Wait," I started, definitely feeling that even though I knew the big secret I was still out of the loop, "He can hear you from wherever he is?"

She nodded and squinted a little at me. "He can hear my heartbeat from Smallville when I'm at the Planet. He didn't mention that one yet, huh?"

I shook my head. "I know about the strength, invulnerability, heat vision, speed, and floating---um, hearing now too----how much more is there?" I refrained myself from gulping. That was already a pretty impressive list of powers. How much more could there be?

"Not too much and they're just little things really. Nothing as impressive as the superstrength."

"Well that one pretty much trumps the rest." I shook my head. If Clark's hearing really was that good, then he'd heard how fast my heart had been going two nights ago. He knew how scared I'd been, and yet he'd still been calm and collected. Maybe he was a better liar than I'd given him credit for.

"Yup. I kind of like the hearing myself. If I had that one, the stories I could break…" She shrugged. "It'd be nice to get to pick out a super power." There was a hint of bitterness in her voice that I noticed but dismissed. At the time, I figured she was just jealous of Clark. Not that I'd personally want to have super powers, although, once long ago and ironically enough I'd told him I'd have liked to be able to fly.

"…and yet, you'd still need the proof to back up whatever you overheard." Clark called, swooping---which was so weird to see because the only thing I'd ever seen swoop before were birds and they have wings---down.

Chloe grinned up at him as he made his final sweep, and I was kind of surprised that he wasn't just blurring in. He wasn't going very fast, maybe twenty or thirty miles an hour. He kept dropping and came in for a landing, sticking it almost perfectly. I say almost. Unfortunately, while he was able to land on his feet, his momentum still carried him forward and he ended up rolling along with it, falling ass over tea kettle at Chloe's feet.

She shook her head. "I give it a five. You need to be able to actually land on two feet and not your back. If this becomes an Olympic Sport, you're so not even placing."

He stood up and brushed himself off. "I really doubt flying's going to be in the 2008 Olympics unless you all have been holding out on me."

"Yeah, I keep my wings folded under the jackets of my power suits." Chloe deadpanned.

He sniffed. "I'd like to see you stick a landing. You know, learning all this stuff isn't as easy as it looks."

Chloe narrowed her eyes. "At least it's not going to kill you."

"No," he said, rubbing the back of his head, "But I'm not that fond of crashing either." Satisfied with their tete-a-tete, Clark turned to me, his smile broadening. "Hey, you made it."

"Sure I did," I said, smiling, and planting a kiss on the side of his cheek.

"Do you want a lift?" Chloe asked.

"Huh?" I said blinking and looking back at her.

"His landing's only suck if he's alone. He took me this afternoon after a few practice flights himself and then he actually stuck everything. I think he's more careful if he knows broken bones are involved."

"Hey! I'm getting better at the flying stuff, really, and I didn't hear any complaining when I took you all around the farm. In fact," he said, glancing at me, "there was a lot of 'This is amazing, Clark.'"

"There were also Peter Pan jokes. I'm pretty sure I wasn't in complete awe, flyboy."

"Whatever," Clark said, rolling his eyes. "Do you wanna give it a shot? I practiced landing like ten times with Chloe in my arms and I was ten for ten."

"Um, gee, I think I'll pass until I'm sure you aren't going to impersonate the Hindenburg."

Clark's smile faltered for a second before he could regain his composure. "That's okay. I just thought I'd share it with you since it's all been about the 'secrets and lies' for so long, but if you don't want to do it, I understand."

Chloe narrowed her eyes at me but said nothing, which is how it should have been. Clark's and my relationship was none of her damn business as far as I was concerned. "Look, guys, I'd love to stay here and continue my Vince Lombardi impression, but Jimmy and I have dinner plans in the city. Oh, that reminds me," she added, digging into her coat pocket. "Jimmy wants to do a double date thing whenever you guys are up to it. He found a laser tag place in Metropolis and he's really excited about it."

Clark chuckled. "Alright but tell him I only do it if it's boys versus girls."

"Couples only was the deal, and I think that's pretty generous, unless you're telling me you won't be using your powers."

He brought his hand to his chest in mock offense. "I am completely capable of doing sports without powers. I mean, I did it all through gym class."

"Yeah, but I know the temptation to just listen for the heartbeat of your next victim, Clark Kent."

"Okay, so the hiding from me might be hard, but I'll play fair and square." He sniffed. "I still want to do a battle of the sexes one."

"You know you'll lose. Boys never get the upper hand, right Lana?"

I grinned a little at that. "Nope, you definitely don't want to mess with the two of us."

"And somehow that just brings up tons of sophomore year flashbacks."

Chloe and I looked at each other and our smiles widened. "We've trained you well," I said, "at least you know who's the boss."

We spent the night at the farm. We could have driven back and followed behind Chloe, but it had been a while since Clark had come home and even if the farmhands did most of the work now, he still found it comforting to come back and do some of the chores on his own. Most of the afternoon passed with the two of us lying together in the porch swing, exchanging gentle kisses and longing looks. He talked a lot and I listened He had so much going on in his life right now---new journalism classes, random gossip on his mom, his wait to see if he'd gotten the Planet job---and I was still all alone outside of him and Chloe. No social circle to speak of. No long term plans aside from the vague goal of hopefully getting back into classes this summer. I still had no idea what to study but knew for a fact that astronomy no longer interested me. It hit too close to home now. Besides, I couldn't exactly tell him that I spent the day avoiding him, could I?

The lulls in our conversation were sometimes awkward and it always amazed me how freely he and Chloe conversed---how they seemed to not even need words to get their points across with each other---and how with the two of us, even with his secrets gone, it felt like we talked in circles.

He was stroking my back when the topic of conversation changed from relating the events of his interview to about the events of today. "When I'm better at it, you'll go flying with me, won't you?"

I swallowed hard and prayed that this time my stupid tell-tale heart wouldn't speed up. "Clark, I'm not sure about the flying."

He sat up and shifted so that he could look into my eyes. "Are you scared?"

It's odd to be grateful to Lex Luthor for anything, but at that moment I was. He got me into martial arts and I'd had enough training in Eastern meditative arts that I was able with quite a lot of concentration to keep my heartbeat steady. "No, it's not that." It was exactly that. I had absolutely no interest in reliving anything similar to my experiences with Zod, but I wouldn't tell him that. It would crush him.

"What is it then?" He asked, his brows furrowing and his bright eyes dulling a little. He looked as distressed as if I'd just kicked Shelby in front of him.

"I just thought the point of today was to get it under control so the floating wouldn't happen on accident. You can't just go flying around."

"Why not?"

"Because it's not good for you. Sure, you might be able to get away with it on the back forty, but if you get into the habit of doing it at the farm, you'll do it where someone might see you."

"But I can fly really fast. Faster than I can run even, no one's going to see me."

"And what about radar, Clark? There are several bases ringing Metropolis and Smallville, and the equipment on that stuff is sensitive to pick even you up. You want to give the army a real UFO to worry about."

"Well, no."

I leaned in closer to him and gripped his hands between mine. "I don't want you to fly. It's dangerous for you to get caught doing anything unusual. Don't tell me it's not or you would have been blurring around Smallville High all those years."

"Yeah, it was…is. I shouldn't show off my powers, but, Lana, I don't know if I want to give it up. It feels right, like I should be doing it."

I didn't want it to feel right for him to be able to fly. I just wanted it to go away. Of course, at the same time, I was genuinely worried for him. It wasn't just about my discomfort. I mean, that was a big part of it, that's true, but I honestly didn't want him to get caught either. I'd seen what that one psycho had done to Lex when he thought he'd still had Zod's powers. The rest of the human race probably wasn't going to be as accepting as I was or even as that guy had been. If people in general fond out, then Clark could get vivisected.

I didn't want that. What the Hell was Chloe thinking encouraging him to be so showy with his powers?

"I just think…and it's nothing to do with flying being kind of scary, honest…" I said, proud of myself for not flinching. "I just think it's safer for you not to use it. I love you and I don't want you to get caught and taken away from me, not now when we're finally together."

He sighed and leaned forward to accept my kiss. "Alright. I promise that I won't fly."

"You have to promise not to do it ever. Even if it's an emergency, you can't fly. It's just too dangerous. Please, for me." I kissed him again and looked back at him blinking my large doe eyes. That had always been enough to sway him to my side before.

He gave my arm a gentle squeeze and sighed again. "Okay, I promise. Anything to make you happy. I don't want you worrying about me."

I leaned back and snuggled into his side, perfectly content. All was well on the farm for now.


	2. Chapter 2

Part Two – Extinguished

"I still don't know how you did it." Jimmy said around a full mouth of nachos. "I swear one minute I was sneaking up on you and the next I hear my own censor going off and you're standing behind me." He shrugged and took a swig of his Coke. "I didn't even know that football prepared someone to be all sneaky like that. I mean, I'm supposed to be the creeper. I've worked under paparazzi---not one of my prouder moments---but I know a thing or two about hiding in plain sight and you still manage to outdo me, C.K. Next time, we are doing guys versus girls."

"Yeah," Clark said, shifting uncomfortably. "I guess I'm just quick that way."

"That's one way of putting it." Chloe said, taking a sip of her own soda and glaring at Clark. Apparently she wasn't any more thrilled than I was that Clark had violated the "no powers" rule.

"Still three rounds of laser tag can be tough on anyone. I took this huge diving leap trying to avoid Lana in the second round and I swore I heard something in my shoulder tear and then a few minutes later, no pain at all." He cracked his knuckles over his head. "Must be those amazingly resistant Olsen genes I've got."

"You don't say," Clark said, staring hard at Chloe. She looked back at him and once again I got that distinct feeling that the two of them were having a conversation without even saying anything. Idly, I wondered if Jimmy ever felt the way I did now, like an intruder in the middle of a scene I had nothing to do with.

After a few minutes of staring at one another, Chloe gave a slight laugh and pecked Jimmy on the cheek. "Yup, I guess we have to chalk everything up to superior breeding."

Jimmy smiled and leaned in to give her a real kiss on the lips. "Our kids are totally going to be little daredevils."

I suppressed a smirk. Jimmy was a sweet enough guy but definitely not my taste. He was far too ordinary to catch my interest. However, I just couldn't see the freckle-faced wonder being the patriarch to a line of little Evil Knievels. As for Chloe…well the girl had always been a little reckless. I could see a brood of little death defying rugrats in her future.

Clark gave Chloe a look I couldn't quite place. "Something tells me that any Olsen-Sullivan kids are going to be very resilient. Self-healing even."

Chloe gave an uncomfortable laugh. "Yeah, well, don't start picking out the cute stuffed animals yet. That's a little far down the line, don't you think? Besides, I plan to be at least a full-fledge columnist before I even consider having a kid."

Jimmy shrugged. "I'd just settle for not having to take the Kawanis Club photos or chase old guys in speedos around the country." He shivered. "Polar bear coverage should come with free eye drops. I think I need to scour out my eyeballs."

"Poor baby," Chloe said, giving his shoulder a squeeze. "At least you didn't have to cover any pigeon population dips. There are some stories too boring for even page 70 of the Planet, even if you do place the copy under the fold and the ads for spray-on hair."

"Whatever, Chlo," Clark said, stealing a nacho off her plate. "My first assignment is about the rising cost of funerals in Metropolis---boring and depressing in one fell swoop."

"At least you have a first story. Perry threw you a bone because he likes you and Kahn let him do it because she's still hoping to weasel an interview out of your mom. By all rights you should be manning the Pet Obit hotline." Chloe said, slapping his hand and getting him to drop the chip back onto her plate. I flinched a little when she did it. I'd landed on top of Clark once and it had felt like slamming on to concrete. I can't imagine slapping him would feel any better. He must be better at deflecting the blows of us mere mortals than I thought.

"If you don't like the story, I'll trade you." Jimmy offered. "I have to cover the annual Metropolis Cat Show next week and I have allergies. I'll be puffier than a blowfish by lunch and all sniffly. I hate that."

Clark grimaced. "Being sick sucks."

"Yeah but by the way you two whine about it, you'd think you were both dying. I've never met a guy that could be all stoic with a little case of the sniffles, right Clarkie?"

"I hate Lois. If I ever figure out a way to staple her mouth shut, I'm so going to do it."

"Here-here." Jimmy said, clinking his glass against Clark's.

"Hey! That's my cousin you're talking about and she's not that bad. She split the credit fair and square with you for the Green Arrow exclusive and she was really helpful to Martha as her chief of staff."

"And yet she mocks my photo taking prowess."

"And manages to use up all the hot water when she stops by still unannounced after random country runs." 

"Okay, so maybe Lois over steps her bounds a little…" Chloe defended.

"All the time." Both boys chimed in simultaneously and then, true to their maturity levels, "One, two, three jinx!"

Clark, no surprise, was faster and Jimmy slumped into his seat with his arms folded over his chest glaring at him. Ah the blessed silence.

"Still, Lois means well, and she's been trying to write stories for The Inquisitor that actually make a difference. She's the only one on staff looking for political corruption stories and not just rehashing the latest gossip from E! News or the National Enquirer." She looked over to me. "Come on, Lana, back me up."

I nodded relieved to finally have something to add to the conversation since journalism didn't interest me at all. "Lois visited me every day at the hospital after I'd been shot and even brought me all the latest issues of said rag to keep me entertained." Of course, the leading headlines on The Inquisitor had been about me and Lex and the mess of our marriage, which hadn't exactly made me feel better, but the Chloe was right. Even if Lois didn't always succeed in comforting or supporting you, she was always there ready to fight it out with you. Maybe the General had trained her well in foxhole etiquette. Or maybe it was just a Sullivan-Lane family trait to dig in and get violent when the going got tough.

"See," Chloe continued. "Lois is a good person. She's just a little brash."

"And a lot critical," Clark muttered. As an after thought he added, "You can talk now, Jimmy."

"Thanks. I was tempted to just start talking anyway."

"You wouldn't have wanted the penalty punch for speaking out of turn." I quipped. "Trust me." Some days it really amazed me the talent I had for sucking all the fun out of the room. Jimmy, cutely oblivious as always, had started rambling on about another investigative snafu Lois had dragged him on. Clark, however, was studying the table cloth very intently, and Chloe was looking at me like she was the one with heat vision.

"Hey," Chloe said, regaining her composure, "Lana, can you come with me to the bathroom?"

Jimmy rolled his eyes and laughed. "Girls. Contractually obligated to pee in groups. Don't take this the wrong way, C.K., but I am not in the market for a bathroom buddy."

Clark finally rebounded from his funk and chuckled. "No problem, man. Some people can actually leave the table by themselves for five minutes without being completely lost."

Chloe threw her napkin to the table in mock indignation. "We need the break for all important gossip and note-comparing. Besides, we need time to cute ourselves up for the sexy strapping guys. You'll let us know when they get here, won't you Clark?"

"Ouch, Chlo, that's cold. You just shot down your boyfriend."

"Did not. I just implied that you weren't the sexy type. Jimmy's adorable."

"Oh well, I'm totally cool with that." Jimmy said, sticking his tongue out at Clark.

"Come on, Lana, let's get back before something shiny grabs their limited attention spans."

"Uh, sure," I said, standing up from the table and giving Clark a quick peck on the cheek. "Be right back."

"So, not that I don't enjoy applying extra lip gloss, but why are we really here?" I asked, fishing through the bottom of my purse.

"You don't think this is all about girly bonding?" Chloe deadpanned, fixing her eyeliner.

"We've never been big on the chick flick moments, the occasional Brad Pitt and Keanu Reeves movie marathons aside, so I assume that you wanted to say something that can't be brought up in front of the boys." "The Boys" was really code for Jimmy, whom I assumed didn't know the big secret. Unless things really had changed in the last six months and Clark just let anyone know.

I seriously doubted that.

Chloe didn't say anything for a few seconds but instead turned around and did a quick glance under the stalls in order to make sure we were really alone. She strode over to the main door and flipped the lock, insuring that we wouldn't be interrupted.

"You know, if anyone has to go to the bathroom, we're going to get in trouble."

"We won't be here that long, besides they owe me. I ran a story last month about the high accident record of their competition and their sales doubled."

"Power of the press."

"Has its perks," She finished, hopping up on the sink and swinging her legs back and forth under her.

"Getting comfy?"

"Maybe a little."

"I'm going to take another guess here and assume we aren't here to talk about Jimmy in private."

She shook her head. "Not that I wouldn't want someone in addition to Lois to do all the girl-talk dishing with, but it's the other boy I was more worried about."

I sighed. I loved Chloe like a sister, really I did, but the girl had a horrible habit of sticking her nose where it didn't belong. "Everything's been going fine with me and Clark. The last two months have been great."

"Uh-huh."

I put my hands on my hips. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"What have you been saying to him?"

"A lot of things, actually. It might surprise you, since you tend to dominate all our group conversations, but we manage to talk amongst ourselves just fine." Maybe I was coming out a little bit more defensive than I wanted to, but after almost three months back in Metropolis, I was developing a little complex over the little journalist cabal that Jimmy, Lois, Clark, and Chloe had established. The four of them together---no matter how much Jimmy and Clark insisted they didn't like Lois---could talk for hours and their conversations always ran the gamut from pretty insightful analyses of current events to inside jokes from various press conference goings on. Being out with them sucked a lot because I just wasn't a part of their world. Being out with just Clark and Chloe, even if it was just a picnic at the farm or something simple was even worse. I still felt that they were closer than Clark and I were, and I just didn't get how that could be.

After all, he wasn't sleeping with Chloe.

Chloe rolled her eyes. "I never said you two didn't have a fine relationship with lots of great dialogue and whatever, but some of what you're saying to him has been less than supportive."

I slammed my purse down on the counter top. "How dare you. I'm always supportive."

"Really? How come Clark won't go flying anymore?"

"Why does it matter, Chloe, looking for a free ride to New York or something?"

She reared back like I'd slapped her. "How could you even think that? I'd never take advantage of Clark like that."

"Well you were all about the amusement park aspect of it all back at the farm."

"I was not. We'd been working on it all day and he was really proud of it. He gets so excited every time he gets the hang of a new power. You should have seen the smile on his face when he got the superbreath stuff perfected."

I shook my head. "I'm surprised at you. You know how important it is for him to keep everything a secret and you're the one encouraging him to use his powers in public. He shouldn't be flying anywhere ever."

"He mentioned that you'd said that."

"Come on, Chloe, don't make me sound like the bad guy here. I just don't think that it's good for Clark to practice being so---"

"Alien." She supplied, her tone defiant.

"I didn't say that exactly."

She rolled her eyes. "Inhuman, abnormal, pick your synonym."

"Now who's being harsh?"

"I'm not harsh. I just don't believe in sugar-coating things either." She sighed and ran a hand through her bangs. "It's what he is, Lana.It not all he is and it doesn't define him, part it's a big part of the Clark package all the same. If you can't handle that, then you owe it to him to tell him that now."

"I can too handle it. I don't see how not wanting Clark to get caught and put in a lab makes me xenophobic."

"It doesn't." Chloe said, her voice softening. "But that isn't the way to keep him safe. It's just forcing him to deny part of who he is."

I shook my head. "Denial is better than being caught. He got this far by blending in, didn't he?"

"And if he hadn't been willing to risk exposure to superspeed to our rescues back in high school we wouldn't even be here having this argument."

"Moot point. This isn't Smallville and there aren't anymore meteor freak psychos running around for him to take on. It's just school and the Planet and neither of those require aerial skills."

Chloe took a deep breath before she continued and when she spoke her voice wavered. Something I'd said had upset her more beyond just her normal concern for Clark, but I couldn't figure out what. "You ride."

"I do." I answered, not sure where Chloe's argument was going. Despite the beautiful stables at the mansion, I hadn't ridden much last year before I'd learned of my "pregnancy." But Donatello and Tyson still lived at Kent Farm, and I enjoyed taking them out for a long run on the weekends when I could. I frowned. "What's your point?"

"It's a talent you have and it feels good and natural for you to do it."

"I still don't see where you're going with this."

"That's what flying is for Clark. He's good at it, and he was born to do it."

I really hated Chloe's penchant for realism. I didn't need to be reminded that flying, just like running faster than the speed of sound, was natural for him. I just wanted him to be normal and safe, like I always thought he'd been. "And this isn't Krypton so whatever he's supposed to do there doesn't matter here."

"But if you can do something and it's as natural and comfortable to you as breathing then why wouldn't you do it? Screw it. He can fly faster even than he can speed. Do you know how many people he can help with that extra speed boost?"

"But he's not in the saving people business anymore, is he?" I asked, genuinely confused. Clark hadn't mentioned anything about fighting more aliens (the evil variety, not the farmboy kind) or taking out meteor freaks. I'd just assumed he was all about being a normal college student and coffee-getting intern now. Had I been wrong? Was he saving people behind my back and cutting me yet again out of a part of his life? I wanted to know, but I'd pressure him about it later. I didn't want Chloe to get all smug about how she still knew more about Clark than I did.

Chloe hesitated and then shook her head. "No, I guess not."

"Besides, how would you know how hard it is to stop using superpowers? It's not like breathing or severing a limb. He'll get used to not doing it. He might even forget he can do it. He did before."

Chloe looked like she wanted to say something and she sat there for a while, deep in thought, her upper teeth biting into her bottom lip. When she spoke, her voice was uncharacteristically soft. "No, I guess I wouldn't know anything about having superpowers, but I still won't encourage him to ignore his heritage. Denying stuff never makes anything better."

"And I'm not going to encourage him to do anything I think is dangerous. I just couldn't do that to him." The fact that keeping him safe also meant keeping him normal was just a bonus.

Chloe sighed and hopped up from the counter. "He listens to you more than he listens to me. It's always been about you, you know---and before you start, I'm not bitter and I'm not jealous. I love Jimmy, and what I feel…felt for Clark doesn't have anything to do with this conversation." She looked back at me, earnest green eyes boring into me. "He's so afraid of scaring you away that he'll do anything to keep you. That's a lot of power to have over anyone, especially the strongest man on the planet. I just wanted you to know that."

It had been two days since our argument, and I hadn't made move one to pick up the phone to call Chloe to apologize. Honestly, I didn't see how I was in the wrong. Chloe and I just had philosophical differences over what it meant to be the Keepers of the Secret. I could already see how both of us being in on Clark's secret was going to drive us further apart and not, as I'd originally hoped, bring us closer together. It didn't matter much because Chloe and I ran in the same social circle (the one that revolved around Clark), and we'd be forced to socialize eventually. In fact, I think the boys had set up another double date for next weekend. I believed bowling was on the schedule.

Joy.

Some days I really missed the life that included VIP escorts to museum openings.

It was another lazy Saturday at the farm. We spent most weekends home there. Usually we drove out to Smallville; actually we always drove out there. Superspeeding was too disorienting for me and, honestly, there were times tooling around downtown when you just needed a truck or a jeep to help you drag home the groceries or the extra cow feed or whatever. I rolled to my left and wasn't surprised to find Clark's side of the bed empty. He always worked the farm early in the mornings and judging by how high the sun was in the sky, he'd been at it for quite a while. I took a deep breath and was enticed by the smell of frying bacon and eggs and fresh coffee.

I smiled and pulled on my bathrobe. Martha, obviously, had never had any daughters, and she'd had to have someone to pass on all her recipes and culinary expertise too. She'd tried training Lois a little, but had quit after she'd lost her third set of curtains in a suspicious stove top fire. Clark, however, was excellent at cooking just like he was at pretty much everything else he tried. Whatever he'd prepared would taste almost as good as if Martha had made it herself, except for pie. I'd never met anyone who could bake a better cherry pie than Martha Kent.

As I slipped down the back stairs to the kitchen, another aroma tickled my nose---browning toast. I frowned. We'd spent almost every weekend at the farm for three months, and I knew we didn't own a toaster. Confused, I hurried down the stairs and gasped when I reached the bottom. Clark was making the toast. And when I say making, I don't mean that he'd gotten out a baking sheet and was browning the bread slices in an oven. Oh no. Instead he was holding up a slice in front of his eyes and I watched, horrified, as twin beams of heat displaced the air and the toast began to brown and then burn.

"Crap." Clark cursed under his breath. "I haven't burned the toast in years." His expression changed from annoyance to concern and he quirked his head at an odd angle---his posture reminded me vaguely of Shelby listening for the barn cats---and then stared straight up at me.

One second he was standing behind the kitchen island and the next he'd blurred over to in front of me, a deep frown marring his features. I yelped, but managed to keep myself from bolting up the stairs. "Clark, don't do that. Do you wanna give me a heart attack?"

"No…I…I'm sorry. Your heart was beating so fast and I was worried and I didn't think and…" he trailed off lamely, shuffling his feet beneath him.

"Sorry, I just wasn't expecting you to be making breakfast that way." I reached out and brushed my hand gently against his cheek and gasped when he looked up to face me. His eyes were still glowing a bright red and it was the most alien I'd ever seen him.

Suddenly it was all too much. I couldn't smell the toast anymore. I took a deep breath, but all I could smell was burning hair and seared flesh. I closed my eyes and felt my knees buckling beneath me, but I wasn't in the Kents' kitchen anymore. I was back in the field watching the people from the black ship murder dozens of police officers. I could feel the smoke burning my eyes and the flames' heat licking at my skin.

Oh god, the burning bodies.

I turned and bolted up the stairs, slamming and locking the door to the only bathroom behind me. Leaning over the toilet, I heaved until bile burned my throat and my stomach felt like it had been turned inside out. And still the sights and sounds of my flashback were overwhelming me---the screams of the officers as they died, the acrid stench of charred flesh, the sight of burnt bones and metal strewn across the field. I wretched again and finally let myself curl into a ball on the floor.

It took a few minutes before I realized that Clark was pounding on the door. "Lana! Are you alright? Please let me in."

I groaned but my throat was too dry to answer.

"Lana!" Clark was frantic by now. "I'm coming in." There was a loud crunch and I remembered how futile it was to try and lock Clark out of anything. He could crush metal in his bare hands. (Bone too), a traitorous voice in my head sniped, but I quickly suppressed it.

I struggled up to a sitting position, and, reluctantly, let myself lean into his arms. He was pressing a cold wet wash cloth to my forehead and it felt so good against my skin. "Mm, that's nice."

He kept stroking my hair and pressing the washcloth against my forehead for a few minutes before he spoke. "Are you sick?"

"Not anymore."

"Then why did you feel the need to call Ralph on the big white phone?"

I giggled a little and burrowed into him. "That's so fifth grade."

"Classics never go out of style." He let his left hand come to rest on my shoulder. "So if you're not sick, why are we both hanging out on the oh-so-scenic tile floor?"

"I…it's stupid." I said, looking down at the bathmat.

"I thought you were the one all for honesty in a relationship."

I hated when people threw my words back at me too. Yes, I did want honesty in a relationship, but I'd realized over the years that what I really wanted was more one-sided than that. I wanted to know what everyone else was hiding for me, wanted to have full disclosure all the time, but I didn't want to have to share what was too painful and too private for me. I don't even think that it's a hypocritical position, really. I'd been lied to and messed with so many times in my life. I feel justified in wanting the truth, especially after everything that Nell, Jason, Lex and especially Clark had put me through.

"I don't want to."

"Hey," he said, taking my chin between his fingers and pulling up my face so that we could see each other eye to eye. Thankfully his eyes were their normal green color again. If I'd had to face that brimstone red again, I think I'd have fainted. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

I nodded. He wanted that to be true, but it wasn't. Clark was very skittish in his own way, always had been. The wrong turn of phrase would set him barn moping for days. Worse yet, I suspected that if I upset him enough, I could send him running all the way to Metropolis or even farther.

"It's stupid."

"I don't think it's stupid, not if it freaked you out enough to send you here. Come on, it's alright, really."

"I…it's just that I hadn't seen you use your heat vision in a long time." I'd never told him how I'd found out that he had powers in the first place. I didn't think he'd appreciate the fact that I set Chloe up. Personally, I didn't see what the big deal was. Yes, I had locked Chloe in a wine cellar, but she'd never been in any real danger. I'd known that Clark would save her the entire time. However, I knew that Clark and Chloe were kind of funny about morality. They didn't see the world in the same Luthor grey I sometimes did. If I ever told him about what I'd done, I was afraid he'd be unjustifiably angry with me.

"Okay."

"And I've, um, never you seen you cook with it. The smell…I…"

"Not a fan of the burnt toast, huh?" He asked, laughing weakly. "For the record, the other five pieces of toast are perfect, golden and crispy."

"Well that's a ringing endorsement." I had no interest in eating anything that Clark had cooked with his eyeballs. It was nothing personal, but I didn't see why he couldn't have just bought the toaster and done it the normal way. There was no way alien made toast was good for anyone.

"I didn't know burnt toast could turn a girl's stomach so much." He added, frowning a little. I noticed he wasn't looking me in the eye anymore but was instead looking at a spot past my shoulder. He did that too, avoided eye contact when he was afraid of where a conversation was going. It was a bad habit we'd cultivated together.

"It shouldn't but sometimes I have flashbacks about what happened to all the Smallville sheriff's officers and the burnt toast just brought me back to all the carnage."

"I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. I didn't know that just seeing me use the heat vision for something as simple as making breakfast would bring up the association." He glanced back at me and I could see the genuine worry in his eyes. It reassured me a little. I knew that above all, Clark would never hurt me.

Intentionally at least.

"Me neither. It's silly, I guess. It's just how post traumatic stress goes. Honestly, I'd blocked most of that day out. It's easier to deal with now that I know that those things from the ship won't ever be coming back."

Clark stiffened and immediately dropped his hand from my shoulder. I stopped, confused by the sharp change in his attitude. What had I done now? Wait, I reviewed my last comment and wanted to kick myself. God, and I'd been so careful in these last few months not to say anything to upset him. Chloe'd drilled that need for caution more than once during our girls' days out, and I'd gone and forgotten it in the middle of my own trauma.

Well fuck.

"Clark," I said, reaching back for his shoulder.

He pulled away and got to his feet. "It was a mistake. I shouldn't have barged in on you like this and I definitely shouldn't have been using my powers to do something as stupid as cooking. I…now that I know how badly it freaks you out, I won't do it again."

I wanted to argue that it didn't freak me out that badly, that he could still be himself---heat vision and all---and it wouldn't bother me, but I'd never been a gifted liar. So I decided to just let him bow out gracefully. "I'd appreciate that. I mean, I know sometimes you have to use the heat vision to help people, like with the speed and the strength, but if you wouldn't do it around me, I'd appreciate it. It's nothing against you. It's just that after what Zod's lieutenants---"

"You mean those 'things.'" He said, his tone sub-zero levels of cold.

I stood up too and not for the first time wished that there wasn't a foot of difference between our heights. Sometimes I envied Lois and her ability to look him right in the eye. "Clark, I didn't mean for that to apply to you." I reached out to take his hands in mine and was grateful that he didn't refuse my touch. "You're special, not like the others at all and you know it. They were murderers and you're not." Although, to be fair, he'd come pretty close to killing Lex that time he'd been high on red meteor rocks, but if I couldn't be held guilty for killing Genevieve Teague when Isobel was possessing me, I couldn't really hold it against Clark for being too far gone on red K to stop crushing my fiancé's trachea.

"Goodie for me."

I blinked. Clark wasn't sarcastic. Well that's not entirely true. He was never sarcastic around me, but the barbs often flew fast and furious between him and his journalism-loving compatriots. In fact, the levels of snark between him and Chloe often reached toxic levels. But he was always gentle and sincere around me.

"Clark, don't be like that. I didn't mean to denigrate your, um, people. It's just Zod and the others I didn't like. You can't tell me that they were your bestest friends either."

"No, not even close, but that's not what this is about." He paused and took a deep breath. "You don't think of me as a thing, do you?"

Maybe a little. Sometimes, deep down, I did see him as a thing. At least during those times when he blurred faster than I could see or when I caught him lifting the tractor without the aid of jack. Then it was easy to stop seeing Clark and only see the alien part instead. But it would crush him if I admitted that, and then Chloe would kill me, strict moral code be damned. "No, I don't."

It was only a white lie, wasn't it? And those didn't even count. I mean, every guy tells a girl that she's perfect even when she's not. Even on days when I had the flu and was coughing up a lung, Jason or Whitney would reassure me about how perfect I was. This was sort of the same thing. I was just trying to reassure Clark this time that despite the alien part he was still perfect for me.

He let out a breath I don't think either of us had realized he'd been holding. "Alright then." He gave a weak smile. "So I think my breakfast in bed plan was pretty much ruined. How about we just go to The Talon instead and try and pretend the new caterer's muffins are as good as my mom's?"

"I'd like that." I said, stepping across the bathroom and placing my hand in his.

And just like the old days, we were able to pretend that the altercation had never happened, that everything was perfectly healthy between us and not just barely spackled together, cracking under the foundation. We were exceptionally good at pretending.

I never saw him use heat vision after that day either. One more concession from him and one more oddity crossed off my list.


	3. Chapter 3

Part Three – Breathless

There were a lot of days when I hated Kansas. Seriously, there are a lot of parts of the Kansasian (is that even the right word?) climate that drive me crazy. For example, it was the first week of April and there was still a foot of snow on the ground. Granted, there'd been a freak cold front assaulting most of the Midwest and the east coast, but was it too much to ask to finally be done with the dreariness of winter and have a little bit of sunshine and green grass? I guess I should be used to the weather here by now. The snow's always piling high in the winter and the sun is blistering hot in the summer. Then there are the tornadoes. Don't even get me started with those things. I absolutely hate them. I'd almost been killed by one years ago, and I still had nightmares about it.

Of course, the nightmares turned out alright because even though I relived the trauma of being swept up like Dorothy, I also relived the part where Clark saved me. That was a memory warm and fluffy enough to make a girl reconsider getting married.

I was sitting on the porch, enjoying a hot cup of cocoa---the Swiss miss kind, even Clark has his culinary limits---and bundled up in my fluffiest down coat. Clark and Shelby, on the other hand, were bounding back and forth through the snow. I was kind of surprised. Shelby's not a young dog so I would have expected him to only have enough energy to sleep in front of a roaring fire on days like this. Yet here he was, fetching the stick Clark threw him like a pro and showing no more signs of discomfort than the average Huskie. Clark was even more comfortable than his four-legged companion. While I was bundled up in four layers---t-shirt, long-sleeved shirt, wool sweater, and coat---he was wearing his ubiquitous jeans and a red t-shirt.

Apparently Krypton was an ice planet.

Personally, if I had a choice, I'd have preferred to be from a temperate climate or possibly a tropical one, but that does get all hot and sweaty, doesn't it? Still, I've never been a big fan of mounds of snow, but Clark seemed to be having quite the ball with Shelby. In a display of maturity that matched most of his conversations with Jimmy, Clark had spent part of the day wrestling back and forth in the snow with his dog.

I had to give them credit. It was awfully cute, especially when Clark let Shelby pin him. Sometimes I really hated that Aunt Nell had never let me have a pet growing up. I mean, yes I had riding lessons since I was six, but I never had a furry friend to cuddle up with me on the bed. Not that Shelby was allowed on our bed when we slept out at the farm. I'm not exactly a fan of animal dander and even less of a fan of dog slobber.

Shelby padded back to Clark yet again, the large stick clenched between his teeth. Clark knelt down and gave the dog a long rub behind the ears. "Hey buddy, you getting tired yet?"

Shelby dropped the stick and gave demanding bark, his tail wagging behind him.

Clark rolled his eyes. "Okay boy, a few more times and then we're going in. I think Lana's getting bored." He picked up the stick and hurled it all the way from the front porch to the front of the barn doors. Then he turned to me.

"Just a few more minutes, promise. Shelby doesn't get enough exercise what with mom in D.C. and everything." He gave a self-deprecating grin and ran his hand through his hair.

"It's okay. I'm good and bundled." I said, pulling a borrowed afghan tighter around my legs.

Shelby ran back toward Clark but instead of a stick he held a long icicle in his mouth. He dropped it at Clark's feet and started barking frantically.

Clark rolled his eyes. "Shelby, buddy, I sent you after the stick. This," he said, picking up the icicle bare-handed. "…is already melting." Still barking, Shelby jumped up and started pawing at Clark's elbows. Apparently he didn't care that he'd picked out an icicle to play with. Clark laughed at his emphatic friend. "Shel, it's already melting, don't you want a stick instead?"

Shelby barked again and nuzzled against the dripping icicle. He was a dog with his heart set on his icy toy. Clark sighed and brought the icicle to his lips and blew. I half expected his breath to fog in the atmosphere like mine was currently doing. Instead, it was invisible. As I watched, the icicle refroze as he blew on it, fresh frost clinging to its sides.

"Alright, boy, a few more times and that's it." He said, chucking the newly frozen icicle back towards the pasture.

If my eyelids had been opened any wider, they would have been touching my eyebrows. "Wow." Sometimes, okay most of the time, I wondered what Clark's definition of full disclosure actually was.

He walked back toward the porch and sat down on the top step a few feet from me. "Superbreath." He said, shrugging. "It's not as cool as the heat vision, um…" he floundered awkwardly, remembering our agreement not to even mention the heat vision in front of me.

I gave a rueful smile and, reaching over, gave him a quick squeeze on his shoulders. "It's okay. I know you just slipped."

Clark's smile returned, although it wasn't as wide as before. "Yeah, um, I'm sorry about that. Anyway, that's the superbreath I think I mentioned."

I shook my head. "Nope. I think I would have remembered that one."

"Oh. Well, that's the superbreath then. I had this cold last year, which was definitely a first for me, and something I so don't miss about being human." He paused for a second and quirked his head toward me. "I'm not a big fan of being shot either."

"Join the club." I said, nodding my head in agreement. Being shot was one of the most painful things that had ever happened to me. I wouldn't say it was the most because I've had more than my fair share of meteor freaks throw me across a room and having Zod stab through my hand was excruciating.

"Anyway, I had this cold and I sneezed and the next thing you know, bam, the barn door flies seven miles away."

"So then Lois's article was true."

He arched an eyebrow at me. "Don't tell me you read The Inquisitor? If people stopped buying that rag then it would go out of print."

"Now who's being a newspaper snob? I wanted to be supportive of her, besides she sent the mansion ten copies to make sure I saw her first by-line. Who knew it really was alien-caused?"

"Heh. I'm just lucky that Lois couldn't investigate her way out of closet." He whistled for Shelby, who'd obviously gotten distracted, to come back to the porch. "So Chloe's the one who suggested that if I could sneeze out that much air then I could exhale even more, hence superbreath." He frowned. "And about eight million jokes about garlic and Mentos."

"Well it is the freshmaker." I offered lamely. I should have figured that Chloe was behind this trick too. If she wouldn't keep encouraging him to use his powers, he probably wouldn't even know how to control half of them.

"Still, I swear if I hear one more garlic joke I'll actually just eat a bushel of the stuff and exhale all through her and Jimmy's apartment. He's an Italian fan. It probably wouldn't even bother him."

"It would her." I said, grinning a little. "She's always had a sensitive nose." So sensitive that she hadn't bothered to wear any of the perfume I'd brought back from Paris. Granted, I'd thought she was dead at the time I bought it, but I'd offered some of my least favorite fragrances to her as a present and she'd kindly declined.

Her loss.

"Yeah, well, sometimes it's not that funny." He sniffed.

"So you want there to be only awe for your abilities?"

"It would be nice." He sniffed again.

Until all this prolonged, angst-free exposure to Clark, I'd never noticed what a whiner he could be. "So," I said, changing the subject. "What else have you been holding out on me?"

"Huh?"

"You forgot to mention the superbreath before. What else can you do?"

"Oh, sorry." He said, and I could tell by his tone that he genuinely meant it. That was the problem with a Clark Kent apology. They were almost impossible not to accept because he was always so earnest about them. "I never did go through the list, did I?"

"Not so much."

"Well, you know about the heat vision, speed, strength, invulnerability, flying, and now the superbreath. There's really not much other stuff left."

Well that certainly was a relief, although, honestly that was still an overwhelming list of abilities. "What have you left off the list so far?"

"Well, I can hear really well."

"Chloe mentioned that. She said that you could sometimes hear her heart as far away as Metropolis."

He nodded. "I can."

"Can you hear mine?"

"Yup, but it's different with Chloe's. It's something that I don't even have to focus on. It's sort of like a background noise all the time. I'd only notice it if it wasn't there or sped up for some reason, you know?"

And there was Chloe again, the powers coach and now the heartbeat that he couldn't live without. I hated that sometimes I felt that I was in competition with her, especially since Clark and I and she and Jimmy were both happy couples, respectively. "Sure. So is that it? You're not psychic or anything, are you?"

He laughed. "God no, and I wouldn't want to be. Mindreading would suck."

"Hey, but on the plus side no one would be able to lie to you."

"They can't really now, unless they're a sociopath." He said, tapping his right ear. "I can tell when someone's heart speeds up when they lie. Still, I think everyone's entitled to their secrets. There are some things that are too painful to let the whole wide world know."

Like the fact you aren't even the same species as anyone else around, I thought to myself, but refrained from saying it. "I still don't believe in secret keeping."

"I know, but you can't tell me that after your life in the paparazzi fishbowl that you don't think people have a right to some privacy."

"That was different."

"Because it concerned you?" He asked, his voice quiet and his tone polite.

"Maybe. I like being able to keep some things to myself."

"I think everyone feels that way."

"But not when the secrets hurt other people, not when the person you love doesn't even know why you can't love them back." We didn't talk much about our freshman year of college. Our time dating after he'd gotten his powers back had been an utter disaster and I don't think either of us had been very happy then. It had been his secrets tearing us apart and I still resented him for it. If he hadn't been so closed off, I wouldn't have been tricked into spending all my time with and, eventually, falling for Lex.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. Chloe told me to and I wouldn't listen. Maybe things wouldn't have gotten so bad with Lex if I had."

"Probably." I said, slipping down off the wicker chair and siddling next to him. "It doesn't matter now though. We're together and I'm safe."

"And Lex is in jail."

"Like he doesn't deserve it."

He sighed and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "No, he does." The vehemence in his voice surprised me a little. Don't get me wrong, he'd been furious when I'd revealed to him that Lex had faked my pregnancy, had violated me in that way. However, I had the distinct feeling that he was upset with Lex for reasons that had nothing to do with me, which surprised me. I'd always assumed I was the main source of the rivalry between those two. Deep down, and I'll deny this to anyone who ever asks, it sort of made me feel important to be the force that had severed such a strong friendship.

"So why all the glowering?"

"I don't want him free, where he can hurt people, but the way you and Lionel managed to get rid of him…it just feels wrong."  
"I won't deny that it wasn't a very Luthorian plan, but sometimes you have to fight fire with fire."

"I don't really believe that."

Well I did. Let Clark be the one with his mind and heart played with and his body experimented on next time. Lex had definitely gotten what he'd deserved. "So I see." I sighed and leaned into his embrace. "Clark, is there anything else you can do that I don't know about?" I wanted to ask if there was anything he was actively doing that I didn't know about. I suspected that he and Chloe were still running the same superhero and sidekick scam they'd run back in Smallville. I didn't like it. Metropolis was a bigger and badder place and he could get hurt. Besides, I preferred it when all his attention was focused on me. Still, I refrained from asking that question because I was afraid of what the answer would be, and I couldn't take learning that he'd hidden things from me yet again.

"Just the X-ray vision." I laughed, and he turned to frown at me. "No, I'm serious. I can see through things."

"Come on, Clark, X-ray vision is for cheap plastic glasses you can send away for on the back of a comic book."

"Three." He said, squinting down at my leg.

"Huh?"

"That's the number of pins the doctors placed in your shattered leg to help it heal when the horse trampled you."

"Whoa."

He nodded. "It's a good thing I'm strictly anti-government employment because the CIA could really use me."

"You'd probably fail the physical."

He chuckled. "Yeah, I so don't want to end up in Area 51."

"So, you can see through anything?"

"Not lead. I'm not sure why exactly, but real X-rays can't go through lead shielding either, so I guess it more or less makes sense."

As if anything in his life had ever made sense. "Um, Clark, I don't know how to ask you this, but did you ever---"

"Sneak a peek at you?" He stared down at his boots. "I might have looked into the girls' locker room once during gym class, but before you freak out, it was the first day I'd ever had the ability and I couldn't control it then. It just sort of happened."

I arched an eyebrow at him. "You just sort of happened to see me naked."

"Not completely naked, just your breasts."

"Well that makes everything better."

He looked back at me and I swear he really did look like I'd just kicked his puppy, erm, Shelby. How could anyone person be so damned sincere? "I didn't mean to do it, honest. It's like the hearing. I don't use it to invade people's privacy because that would be wrong."

"I see," I said, not totally convinced.

"Okay, okay," he said, holding up his hands in a placating gesture. "I might have also used it once when I first got my class ring."

"It had red K in it, right?"

He nodded. "I might have scoped out certain sophomores' butts."

My eyes narrowed. "Like mine?"

"And Chloe's. Did you know she has a birthmark?"

"Actually I did." If my eyes narrowed anymore, they'd be closed.

"You aren't mad, are you?"

"Maybe a little, but you were high at the time and didn't even know it, so it wasn't quite your fault, like with me and the Nicodemus flower."

He let out a breath. "Exactly, besides now I've seen you naked plenty." He reached over and tickled me under my ribs and I laughed.

"No fair," I gasped. "You know that tickling always weakens my resistance to your charms."

"That's the idea," he added, working his way lower and pinching (ever so gently) my butt.

"Clark!"

Before he could get anymore frisky, Shelby showed up on the porch and dropped the drippy remains of his icicle onto the stairs. It was a melted mess but still icicle-shaped. Shelby whined and nuzzled his toy.

"Shelby, buddy," Clark chided, picking back up the icicle. "I don't even know if I can fix this. Why can't you play with a stick like every other dog?" He shook his head and inhaled a deep breath. I brought my finger to his lips and he stopped, letting out a forceful breath of air that caused my hair to flutter in the breeze he caused.

Yup, definitely superbreath, although, contrary to Chloe's jokes, it was minty.

"Why don't we just find him a stick or go in?"

He knitted his eyebrows together in confusion. "It'll only take a sec to fix the icicle if I do it now."

"Yeah, but what's the point. I mean, you said it yourself, normal dogs play with sticks."

"So you'd rather I was uber-normal even on the farm? Shelby's just a dog." Right then, Shelby snorted and Clark added, "Sorry, buddy. What I meant to say was that Shelby doesn't care that I use my powers around him and I never do it in front of the horses or cows since it spooks them."

"I know, but do you remember what we decided about the flying?"

When he answered he sounded like he was a five year old explaining after the fact to his mother why he wasn't supposed to draw on the walls. "That it was a bad habit to get into because one day I'll use it without thinking and then I'll get caught."

I nodded. "Exactly. Maybe you should just stop using any your abilities except under the dire circumstances where you're saving a life. I mean, using superbreath to play fetch with your dog is kind of a stupid risk and it's definitely not a life or death matter."

"But they're my gifts. I can use them however I want to."

"Oh, I know that," I said, making my voice as lispy and innocent as possible and batting my eyelashes. "But what would your dad think about you using your, um, 'gifts' so freely?" I absolutely hated it when he referred to his abilities as gifts. I really didn't understand why the Kents had ever adopted that euphemism to begin with. I didn't see how anything that separated him from normal people could be seen as a present.

He sighed. "No, he'd tell me to be careful too."

"See, then I'm just trying to make sure you still stay careful. With Martha gone, someone has to make sure you stay safe." I took his right hand between my own and gave it a careful squeeze. "I just want you to be with me forever and the only way I know to make that happen is to make sure you never get caught. And it's not just me, do you know how crushed Chloe and your mother would be if you got whisked away to Area 51?"

"Knowing them, they'd probably devise some Mission Impossible-esque plan to get me back out."

I narrowed my eyes. "I'm serious, Clark. I want you to promise me that you won't just use your abilities unless it is absolutely necessary, unless someone's life is at stake. Please. I couldn't survive it if they took you away." My voice broke and my eyes started to tear up.

Instantly I was wrapped in a tight hug and Clark was shushing me. "I promise, Lana. Just don't cry, okay. No more using my gifts frivolously."

I sniffled a little and rubbed my nose. "You promise."

"I swear."

"Good," I said pulling free of him. "Come on inside with me and we'll start dinner."

He nodded. "Alright." Shelby nosed the almost puddle on the top step but Clark shook his head. "Sorry boy. We'll try using a stick tomorrow. Lana says we can't play with icicles anymore."

As I passed through the doorway into the kitchen I was sure I just imagined Shelby growling softly behind me.


	4. Chapter 4

Part Four – Heritage

It was June, but I was standing down in the Kawatchee caves in the same thick wool sweater and down overcoat that I'd been wearing that day on the porch I'd convinced Clark not to use his superbreath. I still wasn't quite sure why I was dressed in a way that was guaranteed to make me pass out from heat stroke. Still, Clark had promised to take me out on a date that I would never forget, and I'd been intrigued, to say the least, by his proposition.

So here I was wishing ancient Indian caves came with air conditioning.

Clark was shuffling back and forth in front of a circular display of the Kawatchee language, which according to him was actually Kryptonian. Apparently the caves had been left for him or, at least, for whichever Kryptonian managed to survive and come to Earth after their planet exploded. That pretty much meant Clark, although Zod's lieutenants had found their way down here once before too. I was slightly miffed to find out that not only was the language in the caves Kryptonian but that Clark read it fluently and had been able to read it fluently since our sophomore year of high school. I mean, I'd come to him almost in tears and completely freaked out by my mystery tattoo and he'd lied to my face about not knowing what it meant. I mean, granted, I hadn't showed him my tattoo the time we were down here in the caves together, but after we got back from China he really should have told me what was engraved into my flesh.

It would have been considerate, you know?

Of course, great mysteries never seem as interesting once they were revealed. Clark had explained that the symbol on my back was the Kryptonian symbol for water, the element of change. Well, I'd definitely call it the element of change what with Isobel infesting my body and everything. He'd also pointed to the figure eight that was on one of the walls and told me it was the symbol for his house and it meant air. I had to admit, even if it didn't exist anymore, it was cool to think of Clark has having had a house. It just sounded so much like an errant knight or nobility or something.

When he stood in front of the symbols, they began to glow in hues of red, blue and gold. He pressed them quickly in a pattern that I'd never learn even if I had a century to observe it and the next thing I knew, one of the walls of the cave had shifted over to reveal a hidden chamber.

He looked down at me and held out his hand, "Are you ready?"

Considering I had just seen a solid rock wall move I was actually the opposite of ready. Whatever was about to happen was going to be decidedly alien and totally out of my control. Still, it meant a lot for him to be able to show it to me. I took a deep breath and rallied my courage. "Sure."

He slipped out an octagonal silver disk from his pocket and let it slide into a slit in a stone table---or was it an altar?---in front of us. There was a bright golden flash and the scenery shifted and changed around us. When everything came back into focus, we were standing in the middle of a huge crystalline structure. Large spires of ice rose into the air and snow swirled around me. It was breathtakingly beautiful.

And cold.

I was glad I brought my coat. This was the kind of place a girl could catch frostbite in easily.

I wandered around for a few minutes and placed my hand on what appeared to be a large crystal slab and again the comparison to an altar came to mind. I turned back to him and noticed that he was still shifting nervously from foot to foot, his hands shoved into his pockets. "What is this place?"

"It's called the Fortress of Solitude."

I gulped and tried very hard to keep my voice from squeaking. "A fortress?" Oh perfect, I was dating an alien with his very own fortress. Well at least when it came time for the intergalactic weapons of mass destruction to blast the Earth, I'd be spared. Now that was comforting.

"No, not like that." He frowned and bit his lower lip. "Well, okay, it might have weapons but if it does I have no idea how to access them and I really don't want to use them ever. Mostly, it's like a giant computer, a super advanced one that's stored the knowledge from, I think, 28 known galaxies."

"28?"

He shrugged, "That's what the A.I. told me. I really haven't spent a lot of time up here so I don't know much about it."

See, this is why I loved Clark. He had access to unlimited knowledge and, presumably since it was a fortress, powerful weapons and he had no interest at all in exploiting them. If Lex had gotten his hands on either the information or the weapons, he'd have the world on its knees in twenty-four hours.

"Wow."

"Yeah, I know. Sometimes I feel guilty about not spending more time up here but first my dad died and then there was all that drama with Lex and 33.1 and then Chloe was sick and…" he shrugged, trailing off. "You know how it is."

Yes, I did. Our lives seemed to have more disasters than most people's.

I reached out and ran my hand over one of the crystals, which was surprisingly warm to the touch. "It's beautiful."

"This is what Krypton looked like." His voice grew quiet. "I guess you could say it's the last part of my home, um, not that I don't think of the farm as my real home, but this is what's left of where I came from. This is it."

Oh. No wonder I got that whole mausoleum from the place. Still it was amazing, exactly how I imagined the Nutcracker Prince's winter palace when I'd been little and Aunt Nell had taken me to Metropolis to see the Nutcracker Prince Suite. "I'm sorry." And really I was. Being an orphan was terrible, but as much as I missed my parents, I still technically had Aunt Nell, even if the two of us never really got along. Plus, there were seven billion humans still out there.

Standing here in what was left of Krypton I think it finally hit me how alone Clark was.

I stepped closer to him and slipped my hand into his left one. "Thanks for sharing this with me."

He smiled so wide that his white teeth matched the sparkling crystals around us. "Really? I was so nervous about bringing you here, because it's so, um, different and---"

"Kal-El!" A loud voice called out, except "called" isn't really the right word. While I could hear it ringing out loud, I could also feel it seeping deep down into my muscles and bones. It was in my head and in the air all around.

It was overwhelming me.

"Clark, what is that?" I asked, tightening my grip on his hand and slightly comforted by his arm wrapping around my shoulders.

"Um, well, that's sort of my father."

"I thought you were the last living Kryptonian?"

He blushed. "Well I am, but the A.I., artificial intelligence, for the fortress was programmed to have my father's memory and will. It sort of acts like him to."

"Sort of?"

"He's pretty bossy."

"I am not 'bossy,' Kal-El." The voice continued and I swore it sounded a little snippy for what was essentially a robot. "I am merely here to remind you about and guide you through your destiny."

"Destiny?" I called out.

"Yes," Clark's "father" continued. "It has been almost six years and yet Kal-El refuses to begin his training."

"Kal-El? Training?" I swear, being involved in Clark's life was the living definition of in medias res.

"It's my birth name," Clark clarified. "Although, I'd probably prefer to have Lois go around calling me 'Clarkie' than answer to my Kryptonian name."

"Oh." That was probably a good thing because I had as much interest in calling him 'Kal-El' as I did in calling him 'Clarkie,' although I have to admit 'Clarkie' was a pretty funny nickname.

The voice continued, ignoring our conversation and, I suspected, me. "Kal-El, the last of the prisoners from the Phantom Zone has been collected and even your Earth mother has moved on to a life beyond your farm. It is time for you to come here to begin your training."

"Training?" I repeated, feeling like a parrot.

"Yes," his father continued. "Kal-El is supposed to train in how best to protect this planet and in order to learn the accumulated knowledge and history of his people."

"Jor-El," Clark continued, answering with what I assumed was the A.I.'s name. "I am sorry for not coming immediately after the last phantom was collected, but my friend was sick."

"Chloe-Sulli-van," the A.I. responded, breaking my friend's name into odd syllables. "She is well now and yet you still hesitate in beginning your training."

"How long would the training take?" I asked.

"I do not answer the questions of human girls."

Clark rolled his eyes and, idly, I wondered if the A.I. could see him do it. "Jor-El, this is Lana." He paused and took a deep breath. "The woman I intend to marry."

"Your imminent destiny is greater than your desire to settle for one human girl." He spit out 'human' the same way a New Yorker said 'sewer rat.'

"Hey! I'm standing right here and I believed I asked you a question. How long is Clark's training going to take?"

"Kal-El's training…" and now the A.I. just sounded condescending, "…will take several years, perhaps more."

Several years? How was I supposed to live without Clark for three or four years? I didn't even like it when he had to pull late-nighters at the Planet. He couldn't just abandon me like everyone else in my life had. He was supposed to be the one who stayed. "You can't take him away from me for that long!"

"What you want, human, is of little concern to me."

"Well it matters to me," Clark replied gruffly, his eyes narrowing and I swear just taking on the slightest reddish hint. "Jor-El, I love her, and I'm not leaving her. Don't even think about taking her away from me either, or I swear I'll rip this place apart."

"Kal-El, you have not thought this through. You and what you can do to save your adopted world are far more important than this girl."  
"Nothing's more important than she is." He said, turning back toward the altar I'd been eyeing. He reached out for the silver disk but paused to say one more thing to the A.I. "I'll come back if I need help or if some other aliens come to Earth, but I'm not just going to interrupt my life for years to do what you want. You can't control my how I live anymore." He clutched my hand more tightly in his, not tight enough to hurt but almost, and pulled the key back out.

When the shining lights faded, we were back in the caves' hidden compartment. I stood still, trying to shake off the flood of vertigo that the teleportation had left me with. Clark was standing beside me, shaking his head. "I'm sorry about that. I always forget what a pompous jerk Jor-El can be."

I squeezed his hand back. "Don't worry about it. The fortress was pretty neat otherwise."

"Really?" He got that hopeful look in his eyes that reminded me of Shelby whenever we cooked steak.

I nodded. "Krypton must have been very beautiful."

He grinned widened and he gave me a quick kiss on the lips. "Thanks, that means a lot to me. I wanted you to like it because eventually I was going to bring our kids there. Not that I'm over eager to expose them to their 'grandfather,'" he said, making air quotes with his fingers. "But they deserve to know about their heritage too, you know?"

I kept the smile planted on my face, but I felt the bottom fall out of my stomach. Until he put it that way it had never really hit me that any children I had with Clark wouldn't be fully human. I gulped a little and hoped he hadn't overheard that. "Yeah, that would be nice."

It was about a week after our field trip to the Arctic when Chloe came bursting into my office. While I was taking two summer classes at Met U---an introduction to fashion design and a history of the Renaissance class---I had also signed up to be a part-time docent at the Metropolis Museum of Modern Art. I guess it was the time spent in Paris mixed with all the high brow culture Lex had exposed me to during our relationship. At either rate, I figured that if I had to choose a profession in life, that it might as well be one that allowed me to surround myself with beautiful things and happy sights. So, I'd enrolled in the Arts program at Met U and was still deciding between fashion design and Art History, but either way, I was sure to be deeply invested in artistry and beauty for the rest of my schooling.

I was sick of outer space.

The docent gig was fun too. I liked being the center of attention when I gave the tours and explained all the nuances of the paintings and sculptures on display. I could seriously see myself working at the MMOMA for the rest of my life. The only disadvantage to my job was the microscopic "office" I was assigned to. It was about half the size of my dorm room freshman year and a fraction as comfortable. With Chloe crammed in here too, I was worried our oxygen supply was going to run out.

Based on Chloe's glare, I had a feeling there was going to be a lot of yelling and that the oxygen was going to run out of my office double quick.

"Hey, Chloe," I said carefully, "What's up?"

Her eyes narrowed at me and, not for the first time, I had to remind myself that Chloe didn't have heat vision and that I had a black belt in karate. "Do you know how badly my week has sucked?"

"Are you on parking meter detail again?" I asked innocently.

"No. I'm on moping patrol again. Actually, it's better than it used to be because me and Jimmy have the moping split between us."

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Jimmy doesn't know does he?"

"Of course Jimmy doesn't know." She said, throwing up her hands and beginning to pace. "I love him like crazy, but he's not exactly discreet. No, Jimmy doesn't know about the E.T. phone home thing, but he does know his best friend is having girl troubles so he's been trying to help Clark out." She shook her head. "It's a good thing that Clark can't get drunk because the way they've been hitting the pub by the Planet he should have had his liver removed by now."

"Why's Clark so upset?" I asked, playing innocent again for all I was worth.

"Oh, I don't know." Chloe said, coming to a halt in front of me, her hands on her hips. "Maybe because his girlfriend and the love of his life won't sleep with him."

Well, jeez, there were some parts about our close little group that I hated, like how there weren't any secrets between us. I hadn't given Clark permission to tell Chloe and Jimmy all about the intimate details of our personal lives. However, her information was spot-on. I'd sort of been faking sick all week and had convinced Clark that for the time being it was better if he slept on the couch. I didn't know he'd been that miffed about it. Of course, I'd been so busy avoiding him that I hadn't really stopped to consider his feelings either.

Still, I hated having Chloe put me on the defensive like this. "Chloe, I don't see how this is any of your business."

"As long as my boyfriend sees it as his mission in life to cheer C.K. up, I'm the one sitting at home at night waiting for their guys' nights out to end. Besides, I hate how sad he is. We've been eating alone together everyday at the farm while he goes through his laundry list of neuroses about how being an," she paused for a second, looked around to ensure we were alone and lowered her voice, "alien is ruining his sex life."

Granted, we'd had a rocky start when I'd first come back to Kansas. It had taken him a while to work up the courage to sleep with me at all. Luckily, and much to both of our relief, he hadn't once come close to breaking any of my bones. The headboard in our apartment, however, was still scorched from the first few times we'd made love. By now, though, everything was completely under control as far as sex was concerned. That was perfectly normal between us. Well not completely normal. Clark, once he got over his fears, was really good in bed. Much better, actually, than he'd been as a human and so much better than Lex it wasn't even funny.

But ever since we'd gotten back from the fortress I hadn't wanted to have sex with him or even sleep in the same bed.

I should have figured he'd tell Chloe everything. The two of them were much closer girlfriends than she and I had ever been.

"Well," Chloe snapped, intruding on my thoughts, "do you want to explain what's going on, or should we resort to charades?"

I rolled my eyes and dropped my pen to the desk. Inventory was so not happening today. "I really don't want to talk about it, Chloe."

"And I'm really sick of the moping. He's been so happy lately that I'd forgotten how annoying his Lana-lamenting can be."

Now that was a nice use of alliteration. "Do we have to go through this right now?"

She crossed her arms over her chest and eased herself down into the chair in front of my desk. "We have all night. Jimmy took Clark out to the sports bar across the block from our apartment. The boys will be so busy with a Wolverines game and a nacho-eating contest that they'll never notice we're gone. Now spill."

Her eyes were still narrowed at me, and I got a flashback to our argument after that mess with Linda Lake. Even though I knew the big secret now, I still had the feeling that she was protecting Clark from me. I sighed. It was better to get this over with now. I knew Chloe. She was one of the top interns at the Planet because she never let up with her questions. She'd sit with me until four a.m. if she had to.

"He took me to the fortress."

"Please tell me you got to wear a coat. That place is freezing."

My eyes widened. I had no idea she'd ever been there. "He's taken you?"  
"More liked dragged. I got accidentally teleported there the first time he ever went and caught a nasty case of hypothermia." She shook her head and laughed a little. "I really hate the Arctic."

"Not a huge fan of it either, but if you're not freezing then you can appreciate how beautiful the fortress is."

She nodded. "Yeah, it is pretty amazing."

"Uh-huh."

"And yet why do I have the feeling that it's a big part of the reason you've forced Clark to cram himself onto the loveseat? This doesn't have anything to do with Jor-El, does it because he's mostly empty threats?"

"Mostly?"

She waved her hand in a dismissive gesture. "Long stories, not exactly on topic right now."

"Oh."

"You were saying."

I shrugged not sure of how to sugar coat it so, instead, I opted for the Sullivan-Lane girl method that I'd been inundated with over the last three years. I just blurted it out. "He said he brought me there because he wanted me to understand his heritage, that one day he wanted to be able to take our children up there."

Chloe took a deep breath and sighed. "I see."

"It was then that it hit me, you know? Clark's an alien."

"Yeah, you've known that for over a year now." She prodded gently.

"I know, but I hadn't thought about having children with him. I mean, I know he meant it in the far-off, long-term plan kind of way, like after we've both graduated from college and everything. Still, I don't know if I want to go through being pregnant again."

"You weren't pregnant the first time."

"But I felt some of the symptoms and I felt what it was like to lose my child, and that was a normal pregnancy, more or less. It felt like one and seemed enough like one to fool all of us." Chloe nodded and let me continue. "Even if I could get pregnant, what do you think the odds are I'd carry to term?"

Chloe bit her lip. "I dunno. That's a question for the A.I."

"If I learned anything from last year besides the fact that Lex is a lying snake, it would be that I am not ready to be a mother."

"And you knew he was talking kids as part of a five-year plan, so I don't see what all the wigging out is about."

"Chloe, does Clark still confide in you?"

She looked at me like I'd suggested that we both eat paint chips. "Of course. That's why I'm here right now."

"And are there still things he tells you that you never tell me?"

She hesitated for a second before answering, as always trying to balance out her loyalty for Clark and her loyalty for me. "Yeah, there are things he tells me that I swore I'd never let get back to you."

"Can you do the same thing for me? You have to promise that you'll never tell him what I'm going to say. I don't think he'd ever forgive me if he heard this."

"Are you planning a mass murder spree or something?" She joked.

"Chloe, I'm serious."

She exhaled and nodded her head. "I promise. I never told him about the baby, you know."

"I know. I appreciate that you did that for me."

"Alright then," She said, picking up a glass paperweight from my desk and shuffling it nervously from hand to hand, "lay it on me."

God, there were so many things I'd rather be doing than confessing everything to Chloe. Root canals and being abducted by Zod came to mind. "I…I've been having nightmares."

"Okay."

"About Clark."

She nodded her head again and when she spoke her voice was quiet and calm. "I sort of gathered that. So is it reoccurring? Is there a theme that I should know about?"

"I…did you ever see that movie 'Alien?'"  
"Yeah," Pete snuck a copy out of his older brother's stash in eighth grade, and he dared me and Clark to watch it with him. Neither of us slept that night."

"Sleepover?"

"Yeah, my dad didn't decide co-ed sleepovers were pushing the envelope on decency until we hit high school. Anyway, I was terrified of the queen and Clark, apparently, has this Sigourney Weaver phobia."

"I thought he didn't know until freshman year."

"He didn't. Sigourney Weaver is just creepy."

I shrugged. The girl had a point. "Oh, huh. I sort of assumed he'd never seen it."

"If Martha ever asks, he hasn't. Any alien movie from E.T. to Aliens is completely off limits in the Kent house. They're all about not perpetrating the stereotypes. Plus, since most of them involve invasions of some sort…well, I don't think they wanted to give him any ideas."

"Or nightmares."

"Yeah, as much as I love Will Smith, I can't imagine that worrying about the men in black coming for you is conducive to R.E.M. sleep. So, you were saying?"

"Okay, so it's totally stupid."

"Obviously not if you're having nightmares."

"Still, it's dumb. I mean, we know Clark."

"Nary an exoskeleton or acid spewing pouch to be found."

Sometimes I really hated her way with words. I just ended up with far too graphic mental pictures in my head. "Yeah, I know. Intellectually I get that beside the obvious, Kryptonians are pretty much like us, but that still doesn't stop the nightmares about chest-bursting."

"Stupid movie oughta be banned anyway." Chloe said, shaking her head. "I assume that's not the only nightmare you've had."

"No, it's not. I've had some bad nights involving egg-laying and pathogenesis and all sorts of worst case scenarios."

"So the egg-laying, you or him?"

"Huh?"

"Never mind," she said trying to stifle some giggles. "I once had this theory that we only think he's male. I mean, who's to say Kryptonians aren't hermaphroditic?"

Now wasn't that whole galaxies of weird. "Chloe!"

"It was a legitimate question." She huffed. "Sometimes we trade off in the embarrassing question department. I wasn't really serious and he knew it. There are days where I make it my goal to get him to laugh about the whole alien thing."

"What does he get you to laugh about?"

"What?"

"If you're trying to make him feel better about being an alien, then what does he try to make you feel better about?"

She hesitated for just a split second before saying, "My mom, um, mental illness runs in my family, remember?"

Yeah, I remember trying to get Lex to have her committed to Belle Reve for her own good. I really hadn't appreciated having my boyfriend working against my efforts. To this day, I still couldn't understand why during that period of our relationship, Clark and I were totally against each other and kept failing to come together as a couple.

"Yes, I do." I replied. Yet, as I watched her reaction, I got the unsettling feeling that there was more to this story than I was getting, that there was more to Chloe than she was willing to share.

I was curious about what she was hiding from me, but her having her secrets didn't bother me as much as Clark having his. Maybe it was because I wasn't looking to date Chloe or maybe it was because a lot of the time, if I were honest with myself, I was only interested in the parts of Chloe's life that directly impacted me. Still, I filed away Chloe's obvious lie along with all the other things about my friend that didn't add up. She wasn't as bad a liar as Clark (he was terrible), but she still failed to completely cover up the fact that something big was happening to her.

"Anyway," Chloe said, clearly feeling the awkward tension in the room, "enough about stale bad jokes. I suppose you don't need me to remind you that everything you're thinking is the exaggerated worst case scenario and that Clark isn't like that at all."

I nodded. "I know, but I still can't help being a little paranoid about it. I mean, how much do any of us---Clark and Martha included----know about baby Kryptonians? He was three when he got here. For all we know he could have started out looking like a squid or something."  
"Now who's been watching too many Will Smith movies?" Chloe quipped.

"I'm serious. It's one thing to love Clark, and I do, I really mean that---"

"I know you do." Chloe interrupted and I saw just a hint of sadness clouding her eyes and maybe something a little wistful too. No matter how much she loved Jimmy Olsen, it was obvious to both of us that Chloe loved Clark more. Some days I was afraid that she might love him more than I did. After all, as far as I could tell, the alien part didn't squick her the way it sometimes did me.

"Exactly." I said nodding. "But it's one thing to love someone so different. I…I don't think I would want to have children with him. It's been so hard on him. I can't imagine that it would be any easier being a hybrid, if that were even possible. It wouldn't be fair to them." And maybe I was full of crap because at that point the person I was thinking about wasn't my potential children or Clark but myself. I did really didn't want to raise toddlers who could life five hundred pounds or kindergarteners who could outrun the family car. Still, it had been hard enough for Clark to find someone to love and accept him as much as I did. Any children we had, if we even could, would be as lonely and isolated as he'd been growing up.

"Well," Chloe said after some thought. "You don't have to decide all this now. Like you said, you have years to go before you and Clark even think about having kids and it might not even work out between two different species."

"I know, but I don't think the way I feel is going to change. Having kids together, that would just be so many more lies that we'd have to tell, that many more medical records and other things we'd have to fake. I don't want to live a lie if I don't have to."

Chloe nodded and paused for a second, clearly deciding what to say. "You know, one day you're going to have to tell him how you feel."

"But it doesn't have to be today."

"I thought you were the one who always pushed unadulterated honesty."

"I am, but this is like a little white lie. If I can avoid telling him the truth for a while, I can avoid hurting his feelings. You know I don't want to do that."

"I know, but I think not wanting to sleep with him without offering any explanation is making him miserable already."

"So I'll go back to sharing the bed with him tonight, sex too. I feel better after getting all my stupid paranoia out. I don't think the nightmares will be back."

"And if you get anymore James Cameron sponsored nightmares, please feel free to call me up any time. Still," she said, shaking her head, "You owe it to him to tell him how you feel. I know Clark. He's going to at least want to try and have kids of his own. He's awfully sick of being the only even part-Kryptonian in the universe." Her tone was strained when she said it and her volume a little too loud. I could tell she was fighting her first inclination to just yell at me.

"I'll think about it, Chloe, and I wish I could say that I was going to change my mind, but, honestly, can you see any sane girl signing up to be in a breeding experiment with an alien species?"

Chloe slapped me so hard after that that I was sure there'd be a mark in the morning. Rubbing my jaw, I stared at her. "What the Hell?"

Now she was furious, a red flush coloring her cheeks and her jaw clenching as she prepared to speak. "Don't you ever say that to him, not ever, do you hear me?"

I nodded, still rubbing my tender jaw, and restraining the urge to check out the reddening in my compact. "I'm not stupid. I know I can't say these kinds of things to him, but there aren't a lot of people I can be completely honest with about my feelings. Only you, Pete, Lionel, and Martha know. This is more like girl talk to begin with, and if I ever said these things to Martha, it would devastate her."

"I can't say it makes you look that great to me either." She replied, crossing her arms over her chest. "Look, I get it. It's like with the meteor-infected. There are a lot of unanswered questions and little phobias that pop-up."

"Well, I don't think Clark's going to become a raging psychopath who should be locked away for life in Belle Reve. Come on, Chloe."

She stiffened and her jaw clenched so much I could see a vein throbbing in her temple. "I get that you need someone to unload all your doubts on. That's how I am about Jimmy to Lois, and there are times I couldn't get through the day without her advice. I also know I'm sort of in this weird position where I'm the best friend to both halves of the couple. I have a lot of secrets to keep, so I can't really fault you for needing to be so open with me. I know you needed to get it off your chest, but you really can't afford to think like that."

"I can't help it." I said, sighing. "It's just how I feel sometimes."

"Well repress it." She said between gritted teeth. "We're all exceptionally good at that. All I ever wanted was for Clark to be happy, and he's been deliriously happy since you pulled a Buffy and came back to life, I mean, without the actually being dead first part. And even though I don't think you two are actually all that compatible, I've held my tongue and supported you both all this winter and spring, even though I've been sort of waiting for it to all fall apart."

"Well thanks." I said.  
"Don't even. What I think or don't think of your relationship has nothing to do with my feelings for Clark. I love Jimmy now." Some days, I felt like her declaring her feelings was a lot like Lois announcing that she was a reporter to everyone she knew. As if both girls could make these untruths possible just by repeating them often enough. Still, I managed not to snort or roll my eyes at her little speech. "I said it to you before. If you can't deal with what Clark is, then you need to be honest with him and get the Hell off the rollercoaster you two have been on since high school because, honestly, you're going to ruin his life if you don't."

"I love him. I'm not letting him go."

"Alright then."

"Right."

"So now that we've reached an armistice, I've gotta tell you that I need to go. Jimmy might actually be home after the ninth inning and I've missed him this last week. I suggest you go home and wait for Clark in something cute. You owe him."

"Thanks for your concern," I deadpanned.

Chloe was halfway out the door, when she stopped and turned around. "You're wrong about Clark. There are girls who would try and have children with him, who wouldn't care."

"Yeah and Alicia was certifiable."

When Chloe spoke, it was so quiet I almost didn't hear it. "Alicia never knew."

"He married her while high and he left that part about being an alien out?" Well that was world shattering. I just assumed that any girl he'd loved enough to marry had to have been in on his little secret.

"Even stoned out of his mind with most of his inhibitions stripped and with as much as he loved her, and I believe he did, he still was too afraid to tell her. He let you in," she said, passing out into the hall. "You really ought to think about that."

I really hated when Chloe had the last word.


	5. Chapter 5

Part Five – Forever

At three a.m. my cell phone rang, startling me awake. I reached to my side, instinctually searching out for Clark, and frowned when I realized he wasn't beside me. That was a huge surprise. While Clark spent one to two nights a week pulling late-nights at the Planet, he was always home by one or two a.m., especially since the new school year had started. Kryptonian metabolism or not, he just didn't have the energy to spend all night at the Planet and then turn around and be attentive for an eight a.m. class. Chloe was just an anomaly that way.

Or maybe the bullpen had just permanently skewed her Circadian rhythms.

Still, it was three a.m. and Clark definitely should have been home by now. Yeah, so I knew he was very nearly invulnerable. I was still panicked. Lionel knew about the green Kryptonite after all, and he changed his loyalties frequently. It was quite possible that he was evil again. I grabbed the phone and tried to keep my heart from jumping into my throat.

"Hello?"

"Lana? Oh god, do you know where Chloe and Clark are?"

"Jimmy?" Now I knew they were in trouble. Jimmy really didn't like me. He knew what I'd done to Lex and he thought I was a manipulative bitch. The only reason he tolerated me was because I was Chloe's best friend and Clark's girlfriend. I, however, had the feeling he'd just as soon set me on fire as hang out with me. If he was calling to talk to me then he was desperate.

"Lana, seriously, have you seen Chloe and Clark in the last five hours?"

"No. I thought they were at the Planet with you."

"They were, but I had some archive photos to catalogue and when I got back they were gone. Chloe left a post-it on her desk about covering the subway collapse off Eighth Street."

"The what?"

"The subway collapse. You haven't heard? It's been all over the broadcast news."

"When's Clark's not home, I don't really like to watch the news. It's too depressing."

"Why am I not surprised?" Jimmy grumbled.

I refrained from snapping at him. We both needed to work together if we were going to find out where Clark and Chloe were. "So you said the last time you saw them they were at the Planet."

"I even headed down to Eighth Street myself. Lois was covering the story for The Inquisitor and my friend Ross Meyer was the photographer on scene for the Metropolis Journal. Neither of them had seen either Clark or Chloe and they'd been there since before Chloe and Clark took off from the Planet."

Yeah, I thought to myself bitterly, but Lois and Ross wouldn't be able to follow superspeed. They could easily be down in the tunnels and no one would know. "Jimmy," I said, look, um Clark and Chloe just stepped through the door."

"They did?" he asked incredulously.

Figures even photographers would have journalistic instincts. "They sure did and they look exhausted. I think they dropped their copy off on Mr. White's desk, but Chloe's wiped. I think she's going to crash on our sofa for the night."

"Can I at least talk to my girl?"

"Um, not really. Clark carried her over the threshold," I rolled my eyes at the marital imagery that statement brought up. "She's already passed out, but I'll have her call you first thing in the morning. I promise that they're both okay."

"Can I talk to C.K. then? I was worried about him too."

Join the club. "Nope. I have to yell at him first, but you can give him a piece of your mind first thing in the morning, promise. Start honing your indignation now."

"Fine but Lana---"

I hung right up on him and sprinted into the living room, flipping the TV on and to the nearest news station.

A newscaster who looked surprisingly drawn for a TV personality, with huge circles under his eyes, was grimly staring into the camera. "Authorities had been forced to pull out of the rescue attempts earlier this evening when the structural integrity of the subway tunnels was threatened. There was a near collapse about three hours ago, but, quite surprisingly, the tunnels have held. The last survivors have finally emerged from the ruins. Ma'am," he said, waving his microphone toward a woman holding a crying child to her chest. "Ma'am can we have a word?"

The woman handed her son off to a man with a mustache who'd been following behind her and I assumed it was her husband. "Yes."

"What happened down there?"

"Honestly, I don't know. One second the tunnel was collapsing and we all thought we were going to die and the next it was solid as it had ever been."

"And you have no idea what caused it?"

"Not a clue but that wasn't all of it. I swear, there was an angel in the car with us."

At this point the newscaster tried yanking the microphone out of her hand. He didn't want to hear a religious zealot ranting either. I, on the other hand, was curious and hoping against hope that the angel in question wasn't tall, dark, and fond of a certain heinous red jacket.

"An angel?" The newscaster replied in the same tone he would have used as if he were asking about the chupacabra.

"Yes, sir. She was beautiful and she saved us. I swear on my son's life that she actually brought two people back from the dead. She cried on me and my leg knit back from being broken. It was a miracle."

By this point the newscaster was finally able to yank the microphone back from her. Looking chagrinned he finished up. "Well thank you very much ma'am. Back to you Bob."

I turned off the TV and took a deep breath. Clearly, Clark was the reason that the tunnels hadn't collapsed, but unless he'd really been holding out on me, I was pretty sure he wasn't a girl. That only left Chloe as the subway angel, and what the woman was reporting couldn't be possible. I'd known Chloe for years. She couldn't be a meteor mutant. She wasn't dangerous or crazy. I pushed this new tidbit to the back of my mind like I had so often back in high school with Clark. It wasn't the time or the place. I'd worry about whatever Chloe was keeping from me later. Right now I had to focus on being angry with Clark. 

Speaking of, if he could hear Chloe's heartbeat from ninety miles away, then…

"Clark! You get your ass home right now." Yes I did swear. I'm not that prim and proper, you know. "I mean it or you will never leave the couch again."

There was a strong wind and I looked up to find Clark shutting the front door, with Chloe passed out in his arms. She looked ashen.

Quickly, I jumped up and made room for her on the sofa. "Oh my god. Clark, is she okay?"

He nodded and set her down on the couch as I draped the quilt Grandma Potter had made for my mom over top of her. "She'll be fine. She's just tired."

"I heard about the subway tunnel you know, and I'm going to bet that you snuck Chloe down there too."

"She asked to come."

"And you're supposed to say no. It's not like she has superpowers. She's defenseless down there and you know it."

Clark stiffened and shifted his eyes to Chloe before looking back at me. Yeah, my theory about Chloe not quite being like the average reporter was starting to be more and more likely. "I'm sorry. You know how Chloe is when she thinks there's trouble. She's the first one into the fray even if it's a terrible idea."

"I know," I said, walking back toward our bedroom.

"Where are we going?"

"I have some things I need to get off of my chest, and I think it's best if we leave her here to rest."

"Sure, but I have to call---"

"Jimmy. He called first and I made up a cover story for both of you, so she's free to sleep here until tomorrow. However, he sounded pretty pissed so I think he's going to be yelling at you come morning."

He shrugged. "I'll pick up the newest Warrior Angel on the way to work. That'll appease him a little."

"There's a plan," I said, my tone neutral. "Come on," I said, gesturing to our room and waiting for him to step through the doorway first. Once he was through, I shut the door behind us and sat down next to him at the foot of the bed.

"I'm mad at you." He started to turn toward me, but I shook my head. I couldn't look into his Kent puppy dog eyes right now or I'd cave, and I needed to get my point across. "You left me."

"It wasn't a big deal, or at least I didn't think the rescuing part would take so long. Usually patrol only takes an hour or two, but this time it was a city-wide disaster."

"Usually?" I most-assuredly-did-not-shriek.

Clark hunched his shoulders at my outburst. "Um, that's not what I meant to say."  
"So you and Chloe's late nights at the Planet have included you two trying to imitate the Green Arrow?" I was so incredibly mad right now that I was seriously considering hitting him over the head with the frying pan. The only thing stopping me was the fact that I really liked it. It had been a wedding present from Aunt Nell that I hadn't wanted to give back after my resurrection.

"Okay, when you say it like that it sounds bad."

"How's it supposed to sound, Clark? You've been sneaking out night after night, dragging Chloe all over Metropolis and I'm sure to suicide slums, fighting crime. Are you nuts?"

"Why is it so crazy?" He said, standing up almost inhumanly fast and beginning to pace in front of me. "I know the Green Arrow and he's a good guy, but he's unbelievably busy trying to keep Star City safe. Metropolis is my city and someone has to keep it safe."

The fact that he knew who the Green Arrow was and wouldn't tell me bugged me almost as much as his late night escapades. I thought we were done with all the secrets and lies between us. I looked up at him but didn't bother to stand. "I thought we agreed that you wouldn't use your powers."

"We agreed that I wouldn't use them for frivolous stuff and I haven't." He argued, running his hand through his hair. "I haven't used my heat vision in almost eight months because you asked me not to. I won't fly no matter how much Chloe tries to convince me I should because you don't like it. I get it, really I do. I don't want to end up in a lab anymore than you want me to, but I can't just not help people. My dad would be so disappointed in me if he knew I was turning my back on people in need, and my mom would kick my ass."

"And you were down there in the middle of a swarm of people. There are witnesses who saw some type of 'angel,'" I said, making air quotes with my fingers. "I know that was Chloe. I'm not sure what she was doing in the car, and why people think she can raise the dead, but, come on, if they saw her, they probably saw you."

Clark stiffened for a second and turned to me, his eyes wide. "People were talking about Chloe?"

"Some woman who sounded like she came out of a trailer park with a crazy story about tears healing her leg but yeah. You two weren't exactly discrete." I stood up and placed a hand on his shoulder. "I was really worried about you. You didn't come home and then I hear about this tunnel accident. What if you hadn't been strong enough? What if all that concrete had come crashing down on you?"

He shrugged. "It wouldn't be the first time. Lana, I told you, except for green K and the random alien attack, I'm invulnerable. There is nothing that can kill me or even make me sick. In fact…" Frowning, he stopped and trailed off.

"What?"

He shook his head. "It's nothing. Look, Lana, I can't promise you that I won't go back out again on patrol, and I definitely can't vouch for Chloe. She'll have to deal with Jimmy's reaction to her vigilante streak on her own." He gave a mirthless laugh. "I have enough trouble dealing with just you and me. But I'm telling you this, if people are in trouble, I'm going to help them. I'm not going to be showy about it, and I'm not going to just go around randomly using my powers, but I'm won't shove my head in the sand and pretend I don't have them either. That would be wrong."

Oh he so didn't understand anything, the big dumb alien. "But you can't go out there night after night."

"Why not?"

"Because you're leaving me alone."

"But you didn't mind it when I was missing the same amount of time because I was quote-unquote 'working at the Planet.' Why should this be any different?"

"I don't know!" I shouted, crossing my arms over my chest. "It just is because one late night patrol like tonight is going to turn into another and another and soon I'll always be waking up to an empty bed and trying to fall asleep all alone because you're putting Metropolis first." I snorted. "Maybe I should just leave now since you obviously love the Big Apricot more than you love me."

I yelped when he blurred down next to me. It had been so long since I'd seen him use superspeed that I'd almost forgotten how fast he could move when he wanted to. Almost as quickly, his arms were around me, and he was holding my head to his chest. "Don't do that, please don't leave me. I couldn't bear it if you did that again. The months you were dead were the worst time in my life, even worse than right after my dad's death."

I should probably have corrected him at that point and reminded him that no one except Martha could have been as important to him as the man who raised him. Hell, Clark and I hadn't even had a conversation until ninth grade, despite the only one mile that separated our farms. Still, it was always really nice to be reminded how vital I was to someone's life, especially Clark's. I pulled back from him and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. "I won't leave you, Clark, I promise, but you have to make some concessions for me. I'm not going to ask you to stop patrolling." I desperately wanted to, but I was afraid that I didn't have enough power over him to get him to quit. Besides, with Chloe egging him on, the odds were terrible that I'd get him to go cold turkey on saving people. I could, however, probably wean him off of it over time. "But---"

"But what?" He asked, his eyes still wide and frightened. "I'll do anything. Just don't go."

I took his hands in mine and gave them a gentle squeeze. "It's okay if you patrol, but I'm not going to fall asleep in an empty bed each night. You can pick three nights a week to patrol and even take Chloe with you, like you said her endangering her life is more of Jimmy's business than it is mine."

"Three nights?" he backpedaled. "I usually do at least five."

"Three is half of the week."

"The smaller half of the week." 

I shrugged my shoulders. "I thought I was the biggest priority in your life, but if I'm not, then I can always pack up my things and head over to Aunt Nell's tomorrow. Her place is bigger than this anyway."

He squeezed my hands so tightly in his panic that I yelped. "Alright, alright. Three nights a week, I promise."

"And you have to have your cell phone with you and on at all times. I don't care if you're taking down drug dealers in Suicide Slums or whatever, I still want to be able to reach you."

"You know that's not necessary I can hear your voice if you call just like tonight."

"But I can't hear your reply, and I don't see the problem with doing it the normal way."

He exhaled and then nodded, pulling me in for a quick kiss to my temple. "Deal. Sorry, I scared you."

"I know," I said, snuggling into his chest and enjoying the feeling of comfort and safety I got from being close to him. I felt so much better than I had twenty minutes ago when Jimmy had called me, and then that cold voice of doubt crept back up my spine again. "What were you saying earlier?"

"Huh?"

"You were talking about how you're only vulnerable to Kryptonite and then you said 'In fact' and trailed off. You were going to say something else."

"Oh," he said, shifting his position and looking down at the slightly worn carpet. "It wasn't a big deal."

"Clark, I thought we agreed you weren't going to keep things from me. You've already been lying to me about patrolling and now I know you won't tell me about the Green Arrow's real identity."

"I promised him I wouldn't, and, in exchange, he's not going to tell anyone that I have superpowers."

Even if the G.A. basically had the ability to blackmail Clark if he wanted to, I still hated that Clark had something he wasn't going to tell me. It wasn't fair. Didn't I deserve to know everything that went on in Clark's life? But that was a debate for another night. "I understand," I said, as gently as I could, even though I didn't. "But if you have something to tell me about you and your health, I think I have a right to know that. I'm the one stuck at home worrying about you if, against all odds, some criminal out there manages to find a way to kill you."

He hung his head in his hands, and when he spoke, his voice was so low that I could barely hear him. "That's not possible."

No, surely I heard him wrong. "Clark," I said, placing a hand under his chin and forcing him to look me in the eyes, "What do you mean 'that's not possible?'"

He looked at me and I swear he was as nervous as that day in the loft when he blurted out everything to me. "I'm not just invulnerable. I have phenomenal recuperative powers. Lionel once was able to make a serum with my blood. Helen sold him the sample unlabeled so even to this day he doesn't know it was mine, but the serum he created was able to bring people back from the dead."

And then it clicked in my head. "Adam Knight/Chad Nash. It was the serum from your blood I found him injecting when I thought it was really IV drugs."

He nodded. "I…I don't think I can die."

"Well it's a large leap from Lazarus blood to immortality, Clark."

"There's more," he said, staring at me with wide green eyes.

I should have known. There's always more with Clark. He's like the tip of the iceberg of boyfriends. "Alright," I said, rubbing the back of his hand with my thumb. "Whatever it is, I'm not going anywhere, I promise." Even if I had just threatened that very thing five minutes ago. So I was fickle sometimes. So sue me.

"Remember when you were friends with those med students and they injected you with that stuff that made you flatline?"  
I nodded, "Yeah, not exactly one of my prouder moments."

"It wasn't your fault. I practically ruined you when we broke up and I couldn't even give you a real reason for why I supposedly fell out of love with you. It's no wonder you hit rock bottom."

I wanted to add, "You're right, you ass," but decided against it. I really wanted to get the rest of Clark's story out of him, so instead I replied. "It's all in the past now. I'm just sorry I dragged you and Lex into everything." Alright, so granted now I wished Lex really had stayed dead back then. Stupid Chloe, but at the time I hadn't intended for anyone else to get hurt, really.

He took a deep breath and spit out the rest of sentence in a rapid-fire style that would have made Chloe proud. "They injected me with the drug and it was Kryptonite based. I mean it went right into my veins and stopped my heart and everything, and I still recovered. That poison boils my veins and everything. It's radioactive to me and I still didn't stay dead. I…I really think that I can't die." He sighed and ran his other hand through his unruly bangs. "I'm not even sure I'm going to age like everybody else." He laughed and it was one of the most broken sounds I'd ever heard. "Hell, with my luck I'll look like I'm 18 for the next century."

I wanted to protest that he was overreacting and that his fears were unfounded, but nothing was impossible with Clark. He could fly for Christ sakes, even if I never let him. If he thought he was immortal or slow to age (same difference), he was probably right. "Um, okay, well that's a new one."

"I probably should have told you earlier when you asked about all my different powers, but I didn't think of immortality as a superpower exactly and I'm not a hundred percent sure about it. Besides, with all the aliens that make it out of the Phantom Zone or wherever, I might end up fighting someone I can't stop so it's all moot."

Well that certainly was a grim outlook. I sighed and gave him the biggest smile I could muster. "Clark, it's four a.m., and we're both really upset and exhausted. Let's sleep on it and we can talk about it over breakfast if you want." I sat leaned up and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips. "I love you and honestly I don't care. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, even if I get all old and wrinkly and you don't."

And the Oscar so goes to Lana Lang.

"Really?"

"Yes, really, silly." I said, giving him a slightly deeper kiss and hopping up to pull back the covers again. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm going back to sleep. I have a nine o'clock class."

He nodded and curled next to me and to my moderate surprise I found that he'd already speeded into his pajamas. I'd have to talk to him about that. I didn't really want him using his powers if he didn't absolutely have to. I cuddled up next to his body—it was as warm as an electric blanket like always---and listened to the regular rhythm of his snoring. Usually it was the white noise I used to help lull myself to sleep, but this morning my head was churning with too many thoughts: Chloe's probable meteor mutant status, the Green Arrow's association with Clark, my role as professional liar/ass-coverer for Clark, and, worst of all, Clark's immortality.

If the worst case scenario came to pass, how in the world would he still be able to love frail old lady me? If the situation were reversed, I would never stand by elderly Clark. Hell, I couldn't even wait out the six month tour of duty before Whitney came home. One day, if he really did stay young for decades, Clark was going to leave me.

With a shudder, I realized that I might have to leave him first.

Talk about 'until death do us part.'

The next morning, he was already up by seven, cooking Chloe the biggest stack of strawberry pancakes I'd ever seen. I loved Martha's pancake recipe, but I hated strawberries. When Clark made them for me, they were always blueberry, and when on those rare occasions he made them for Chloe, he used her favorite red fruit. After Chloe revived, ate, and rushed home to a sure-to-be-pissed Jimmy, I offered to continue our conversation from last night, but Clark declined. He had an early morning at the DP and didn't want to get into the emotionally heavy stuff right before work.

I agreed to it, thinking we'd get around to it at suppertime, but we never did, not then or ever again. We swept it under the proverbial rug along with the fact that he could fly or make ice with his breath and fire with his eyes. At least within the confines of the Lang-Kent apartment, Clark was as normal as anybody else.

And that was what kept our relationship healthy and strong---denial.


	6. Chapter 6

Part 6 – Vision

It was January three years almost exactly since I'd come back from the dead. We'd settled into a regular rhythm in our lives. I worked shifts at the Metropolis Museum of Modern Art and was almost through with my classes certifying me with a degree in Art History. Similarly, Clark, whose Central Kansas credits had not transferred to Met U, was one semester away from graduating with a degree in journalism. He spent twenty hours a week working at the Daily Planet, still as an intern. I didn't mind that much because his work schedule matched my own so he was almost always home when I wanted him.

He'd stuck to his promise to only patrol three times a week. He went out with Chloe on Sundays, Mondays, and Thursdays (he insisted on always saving people on a Thursday), but he never went out the other times during the week. He'd wanted to patrol at least one weekend night since Fridays and Saturdays tended to have people act more wildly. Those were the nights with more car accidents and when people were most often rushed to the ER. I'd refused. Those were date nights, after all, and I would not have him blurring out to save someone who'd been too stupid to hold their alcohol.

Above all, everything in our apartment was blessedly normal. I honestly couldn't remember the last time I'd seen him use his powers and, most days, I could almost convince myself that he was completely human. Still, when we sat cuddled next to each other late night in bed, he'd turn on the news and, whenever there was a bank robbery or massive fire covered, he'd get this guilty look on his face and squirm a little in his place, as if he could retroactively stop the tragedies that had occur on his off days. Sometimes, too, he'd quirk his head in that weird way he had that reminded me of Shelby and I knew he'd heard a siren or police scanner. It was then he was always most tempted to break our pacts, and also then that I'd kiss him or convince him with my womanly wiles to forget about the world outside of our own.

We were both blissfully happy, and then the weirdness flared up again.

It was five a.m. and still dark outside our window when Clark screamed. Instantly, I was up out of the bed and leaning over his side. "Clark, what's wrong?"

He screamed again, his eyes clenched shut, and then flailed his left arm against the headboard. It shattered instantly. I stepped backed a few feet, fearing that he'd shatter me too, not intentionally of course, but he was in so much pain, I wasn't convinced that he really even knew where he was.

"Clark!"

Gritting his teeth and still clenching his eyes shut, he turned toward me. "Migraine."

And then I was more afraid than I'd been the day that Lionel had threatened to kill Clark. After all, he didn't get migraines. "What?"

"I…I don't know," he panted. "The only other time I had a headache this bad was when I developed X-ray vision. It didn't even feel this way with the heat vision." He gasped and screamed. "Call my mom and Chloe. They'll know what to do."

I seriously resented that he didn't trust me with this situation, not that I had any idea what the Hell I was doing. It wasn't like I was a vet or anything. Still, I had always hated that when he was really in trouble it was Chloe he always turned to. Of course, he'd also asked for Martha so he probably saw Chloe as just another member of his family, just like a younger sister.

That petty thought made me feel better.  
Clark groaned again and I dashed into the living room and grabbed the phone. I called Martha first, even if she was hundreds of miles away, because she deserved to know about her son. She picked up on the first ring and I wasn't surprised. It was already 6 a.m. on the east coast and Martha was always up bright and early to review bills and daily agendas. "Martha!" I blurted the second she said hello on the other end.

"Lana?"

"It's Clark. He's sick and I don't know what's wrong and he told me to call you and oh God."

"Lana, shh, it's okay. What's wrong exactly?"

"He's got a migraine and he says it's like when he got his X-ray vision, but it hurts worse now, and I'm so scared." I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and my voice was cracking as I spoke.

"Lana," Martha said forcefully. "Calm down. You can't panic now because he needs you. Listen, I had a breakfast scheduled with Lionel, coincidentally enough, and we'll cancel and fly back to Metropolis as soon as we can, but it's going to take a few hours. Now, take a deep breath and call Chloe. She's dealt with this kind of thing before, not the X-ray vision exactly, but she's seen Clark sick and she's dealt with new powers. Whichever one this is, she can handle it."

I stiffened at Martha's instructions. The clear implication from her, just as it had been from Clark, was that I could not handle this situation. I'd be indignant about their lack in faith in me, if I hadn't suspected that they were right.

"Lana? Are you still there?" Martha called.

"Um, yeah. I'll call Chloe. Please," I added, my voice approaching a whine, "hurry."

"We will."

I was so freaked out that it took me a few minutes before I registered the dial tone on the other end. Taking a deep breath, I dialed up Chloe's number. They, too, answered, on the first ring.

"You've reached Jimmy Olsen and Chloe Sullivan. It's five thirty in the morning, but that's okay because the Planet never sleeps." Jimmy deadpanned on the other end.

"Jimmy!"

He sighed. "And I was so hoping it was going to be C.K. calling me. Lana, what do you want?"

"I need to talk to Chloe. Clark's sick."

Jimmy groaned. "If he's a little sick give him some Nyquil and if he's the uber-sick, the emergency rooms are open. Why are you calling Lana?"

I figured Jimmy's reaction was mostly because I was calling and waking them both up earlier than even they had to be conscious for work at the DP. Jimmy was Clark's best friend besides Chloe and usually such news would freak him out too. "No, I'm serious. Um, Clark has some allergies and his mom's not in town but Chloe's been friends with him longer and she knows how to keep things under control until Martha gets into town."

"Mrs. Kent is flying in from Washington?" Jimmy's tone had done a 180 from sarcastic to worried. "Why don't you really take him to the hospital?"

"Um, the Kents are Scientologists and don't believe in doctors."

"I thought they were Lutherans."

Stupid investigative journalist instincts. "Nope. He can't go to the hospital. He just needs Chloe. Please put her on."

"Sure thing. Look, if there's anything I can do for C.K., please let me know."

"Soup," I blurted out without thinking. Most of the grocery stores and delis in the city wouldn't be open for hours. Waiting for soup would keep Jimmy distracted.

"Okay, okay." He agreed and I could see him nodding his head emphatically on the other end. "Here's Chloe."

"Lana?" Chloe said, her voice surprisingly calm. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know. All I know is that he says his head hurts and it must be really bad because he's thrashing so much in bed that he broke the headboard."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, fine, but I have no idea what to do."

"Don't worry." She said, her tone as brusque and assured as it was when she interviewed people. "I'll take care of it."

God, I hoped she could.

"He's in the bedroom," I said, pointing to the door when she walked into the apartment twenty minutes later.

She nodded, pulling off her scarf and overcoat and dropping them onto the couch. "Thanks. Just give me a few minutes to talk to him. You already called Martha, right?"

I nodded, still crying a little. "She and Lionel will be here in a few hours."

Chloe nodded back but I could see her stiffen when I mentioned Lionel's name. Well he had tried to kill her after all. I could see how that could put strain in their relationship. "That's good. Martha always knows what to do."

I hiccupped as I spoke. "I know." Then my voice wavered. "God, Chloe," I whined as he screamed in the other room. "What if he doesn't get better?"

"Pretty doubtful, but," she said, grabbing hold of both my shoulders. "You need to calm down. It's not going to help anybody if you stay hysterical, alright. We don't have time to console you and take care of Clark. So suck it up, you got it?"

I blinked, unused to having anyone since Adam call me on my bullshit. "Got it." I answered, sniffling.

"Then don't sniffle. Just be a grown-up for once." She said, passing into our bedroom and shutting the door behind her.

Damn it! I thought that I was going to be allowed in on their tete-a-tete. I was his girlfriend, after all. Even if I was a little upset, I could be as supportive as that usurper Chloe. Screw it. I wasn't going to be locked out of their conversation. Quickly, I dashed to the kitchen cupboard and grabbed a glass. Leaning against the door, I placed the glass up to the wood and listened in. (I'd learned a few things about spying since my Luthor mansion days.)

"Hey, Chlo." I could hear Clark croak out on the other end of the door.

"How you feeling?" She asked.

"I thought you didn't go in for obvious questions."

"I don't usually but I need to know exactly what's going on. Lana said you had a migraine."

"It hurts. It's, I don't know, it's like in my eyes. It feels like my head is pounding."

I heard Chloe sigh through the door. "Can you open your eyes for me? Are you worried about the heat vision?"

"Maybe a little."

"Please," I need to see your eyes and see if your heat vision's acting up or something."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Chlo."

"And I can't help you unless I know what's going on." Her voice lowered some, but even then I was able to just barely make out her words. "You know I can't just fix you up the way I can most everyone else, Clark. Good old fashioned research is the best I can do."

"See and this is what keeps you from really being the Faux to my Harry Potter," He ground out.

"That's just bad," she said, laughing. "Come on. Open your eyes for me. I promise I'm not standing anywhere near you."

"Okay." 

And that's when the door I was standing in front of burst into flames. I yelped and jumped back as quickly as I could, dropping the glass in the process and cursing under my breath. I ran to the kitchen sink and filled up the nearest bowl to the brim with water and threw back onto the door as soon as I could. We really needed to keep an extinguisher around the house just in case.

Reaching out hesitantly to the knob, I made sure it was cool and then opened the door. Clark had his eyes clamped shut again and Chloe was pressing a cool wash cloth to his eyes. I noticed that it wasn't steaming. Apparently the heat vision was dying down.

"Clark?" I asked, trying very hard not to look at the remains of our door. Any displays of heat vision, even if I'd missed seeing his eyes flare up, left me sick to my stomach. Not that I could tell him that.

"Clark," Chloe said softly, unfazed by the still lingering smell of smoke in the room, "I want you to open your eyes."

He shook his head. "Can't."

"Are you going to shoot off your heat vision again?"

"I'm not sure."

"How can you not be sure," She prodded a little more forcefully. "You know what it feels like, what muscles you're using when you activate your heat vision. You've had it for almost ten years. You know how to control it."

He shook his head. "I haven't used it for almost three years, Chlo."

Chloe picked her head up and glared at me. "I see, um, no pun intended." She reached down with her right hand and started stroking his bangs. "You remember what it's supposed to feel like, though. It's something instinctual." She looked back up at me. "Something you were born to do."

He nodded and took a deep breath. "Yeah, it's…it's okay. My eyes don't feel normal, but they don't feel all itchy and burning like they do with the heat vision. It's just different."

"Different how?" She continued.

"Tingly maybe."

She pulled her hand back from his hair and lifted away the washcloth. "Open your eyes for me."

"Chlo, I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Stop being such a big baby and open your eyes."

Clark, not one to be called a wimp by his female friend or at least not someone to stop defending his manly pride, opened his eyes. When he did, I gasped. Chloe flinched slightly at the unexpected sight before us, but steadied herself. A new expression crawled across her face, the one I recognized as investigative reporter. She was still trying to figure everything out. Currently, I was working on just trying not to panic. Clark's eyes were red-rimmed, but not the russet color that circled his eyes when he used his heat vision. The pupils themselves were scarlet red.

"Chlo?" He asked, sounding as nervous as I felt.

She took his hand and when she spoke her voice was soft and gentle. "I'm right here."

"Everything looks funny."

Her brows knitted together and she was completely in reporter mode now. "How does it look funny, Clark?"

And that was Chloe for you. Even Clark was scared by whatever bizarre alien thing was happening to him, and she was trying to figure it out just a logically as she shifted through leads. If I lived another fifty years, she and I would never be anything alike and I'd never be able to adapt the way she could. She was Clark's support when things went to Hell and all of us knew it.  
I wasn't quite sure what that made me.

He continued. "I don't know, everything's kind of blue except for you and Lana. You guys are red and yellowish."

Chloe grinned and let out a deep breath. "Cool."

"Huh?" Clark and I both chorused.

"I think we can conclude that you're not dying and the heat vision isn't really going wonky." I swear she was smiling when she said it.

"And I repeat, 'huh?'"

She rolled her eyes. "You're seeing in infrared. Haven't you ever seen Predator?"

"Um, you do remember who you're talking to, right?"

"Oh yeah, the no alien movies rule." She shrugged, "Your loss. It's a terrible movie but everyone in it became a governor."

"Really?" He asked, perking up.

She nodded. "Yup. Arnold and Jesse Ventura, which just goes to show that Minnesota and California are crazy."

"Heh. That's kind of cool, really."

Unbelievable. The two of them were analyzing bad eighties scifi movies as if something life changing and (surprise, surprise) weird wasn't happening to Clark. I really didn't understand their relationship or how Chloe could be so snarky in dire situations.

"It's an odd coincidence," She agreed.

"So," he said, gesturing to his eerie red eyes (and I'd thought heat vision was bad), "Is that how you know about infrared?"

"A little but, please, you're talking to a girl with a flash bang grenade in her trunk and a career military uncle." She grinned wider. "Lois and I might have stolen some of his night vision and infrared stuff once or twice. In fact, I think she has a stock pile of all sorts of toys she uses on assignment." She clapped her hands together. "This is going to be great. I mean between this, the X-ray vision, and the hearing, you won't even need surveillance equipment for the occasional stake-outs."

"You know, we aren't actually cops."

"But you get what I mean. Occasionally we have to scope situations out, especially for getting the nitty gritty about Intergang." She stuck out her bottom lip and pouted a little. "You know you get all the coolest powers."

"Gee thanks. I'll let you have a few."

"Don't I wish?"

Unbelievable. Un-freaking-believable. Clark and Chloe were the living definition of resilient. I don't know. I just felt with something this big and overwhelming there should be more wailing and gnashing of teeth. And definitely more angst.

"Um, guys?" I interrupted.

Both their heads snapped back to me and I'd gotten the distinct feeling that they'd forgotten I was even in the room. That was also par for the course and I know that Jimmy had to feel the same way. Whenever those two got going in a conversation, the rest of the world suddenly faded away. I loathed that.

"Yeah?" Clark asked, his eyes inconceivably piercing.

"Don't you want to work on practicing going back and forth from regular vision to, um…"I trailed off, not quite sure what he was going to call this newest deformity, erm, ability.

"I'm thinking we'll keep it simple. So infrared vision, right?"

Clark nodded. "Works for me." He turned back to Chloe. "Up for a few rounds of practicing."

She smirked. "At least this won't result in garlic breath or holes in your front lawn."

"Smart ass."

"Naturally."

And with that I slipped out of the room, feeling like a third wheel in my own home.


	7. Chapter 7

Part 7 – Endgame  
"Alright," Clark said, holding up a key ring in front of Jimmy. "Everything's all set up. Perry's loaned me the keys to his office and he's even left out his Pulitzer for Chloe to actually touch. Lana and my mom (Martha was home this week for Clark's and my graduation from college) have prepared the perfect romantic dinner, and this key ring contains the key up to the roof with the Planet."

Jimmy took the keys offered to him and shoved them nervously into his pocket. "I don't know, C.K., I don't think taking her to a newspaper editor's office is that romantic."

"Trust me," he replied, "It's not just any editor. Perry's the Editor-in-Chief of the DP, and we've redecorated his office just for tonight with Chloe's best articles. Lois even got back from the sign store with the engraved 'Editor-in-Chief: Chloe Sullivan' placard for the desk. She's going to love being able to pretend she's in charge for an hour or so. And then this is the key part," He said holding up a finger and forcing Jimmy to look into his eyes. "You have to make sure you take her up to the roof just as the sun sets. The way the setting sun hits the globe is beautiful and then, bam, you pull out the ring. There's no way she's going to say no."

Jimmy bit his lower lip. "I don't know. I really thought that the plan where I took her to the Wolverines' game and had the question popped on the scoreboard would work really well."

I shuddered and Clark nudged me gently on my shoulders to get me to stand up straight. Jimmy had been planning to propose to Chloe for over a year, and he'd come to Clark with his stadium-inspired plan. Then Clark had come to me and Lois, begging for our help and the feminine touch because, seriously, a stadium? There were days when both of us wondered if Jimmy had even ever met Chloe. But she loved him and he doted on her and helping him plan out the proposal (even he'd rather put an asp to his chest than ask me for help) had been fun.

Martha had cooked a strawberry pie for Chloe and I'd been in charge of the rest of the food. I'd cooked the handful of recipes I'd picked up in Paris, and Lionel had donated one of his most expensive and exquisite champagnes to the dinner. If Jimmy asked, though, it had come from Metropolis liquors. He hated being in debt to a Luthor (whether it was me or Lionel). Lois had arranged the placard for Chloe and framed her favorite articles, setting them up in Perry's office, but it was Clark who'd come up with the dream date at the Daily Planet.

He'd gone to Perry and convinced him to loan us his office for the night. Perry had handed it over without a second thought. I wasn't surprised. Clark and I had saved his life years ago, and one of his Pulitzers came from his article covering Lionel's conviction, which would never have happened without Chloe's testimony. Clark had also been the one to insist on Jimmy taking her up to the Planet to watch the sunset shining across the golden globe. Hell, he'd even picked out the ring Jimmy'd purchased. It was a very simple solitaire in a diamond-shaped cut set off by the tiniest emerald I'd ever seen. It was a nice enough ring, considering the non-budget Jimmy had been working with, but it wasn't nearly as nice as the engagement ring Clark had given to me three weeks ago.

That's right, Clark had proposed to me and I'd said yes. It made sense that Clark was helping arrange Chloe's engagement, since she'd helped to arrange ours. She'd come to me over two months ago and admitted that Clark was planning to propose at the end of the school year at the Fortress of Solitude. The wrinkling of my nose in disgust must have been enough to tip her off that I wasn't interested in having my engagement take place in an alien landscape.

Could you blame me?

We'd fought and she'd resorted to the same old tired argument urging me tell him how I really felt about his origins. I'd refused because I wanted Clark---I still wanted Clark even now---and I was going to make it work even if I had to ignore the alien part until the day I died.

Chloe stormed off, furious, but she loved Clark as much as I did (and I hated that that was true), and she wanted him to be happy as much as he wanted her to be happy. Despite how she felt about the match, she'd gotten together with him and arranged a perfect engagement, something far more romantic than that half-assed collection of candles Lex had put together. Clark had flown us to the Eiffel Tower (I'd allowed him to fly just this once because a mystery trip for an engagement was too hard to resist). Clark proposed there on bended knee and everything. He'd even presented me with a diamond that dwarfed my old ring. I know. I'd compared them, just because I was "dead" didn't mean I had to give my jewelry back to Lex, did it? I hadn't been thrilled when he'd admitted he'd made the diamond. It freaked me out to realize how strong he actually he was. I mean, lifting a tractor was one thing, but applying enough force to do what it took the Earth millions of years to do in only minutes was mind boggling.

Maybe I'd replace his ring with Lex's and hope he wouldn't notice the switch.

The cuts and sizes were close enough that he might not notice for months.

"Lana?"

"Huh?" I said, snapping back to attention.

Jimmy wiped his hands off on the front of his dress slacks. "Everything's set down in the office, right? All the food?"

"I nodded. One Kent specialty pie and some of the best cuisine Paris has to offer. It's all tre romantic." I said, slipping into an accent I hadn't used in years.

He nodded and then gulped. "Okay. Well that's it." He took about two steps to the door before he panicked and bolted back toward the park across the street from the Planet's main entrance. Clark stopped his retreat by grabbing his shoulder. 

"Jimmy. It's going to be okay. I know she'll say yes." He looked down at the sidewalk when he said that part and his tone was disturbingly wistful. I didn't like it.

"I know, C.K., but I'm so nervous. If she says no, I don't know what I'll do."

"Jimmy, she's not going to say no." I offered. He stared at me like he'd prefer that I crawl back to whatever sewer I crawled out of instead of talk to him. Well that was the last time I tried to be reassuring.

He pulled at the collar of his green button down. "God, I don't think I can do this."

"Look," Clark said, placing his hands on either shoulder. "It isn't that hard. You've known Chloe for years, right?" Jimmy nodded and let him continue. "Then you just tell her how you can't live without her. How's she the most important person in your world and how you can't imagine a morning without sharing a cup of coffee with her or an afternoon without her snark. You're just promising to always be there for her, which is anticlimactic because you already are. We're…you're partners," he, said, coughing quickly to cover his mistake. Jimmy was too keyed up to notice but I wasn't. I had the sinking suspicion that the reason that Clark had been so organized when helping Jimmy was because in the back of his mind he'd planned out how he would have asked Chloe to marry him.

I was so grateful that Jimmy Olsen existed and was about to take Chloe off the market. I did not want to deal with the competition.

Jimmy nodded and gave a pained smile. "You really think that's going to work C.K.?"

He nodded. "You know, Chloe. She's all about the simple. It doesn't have to be eloquent. It just has to be true." He gave Jimmy a quick pat on the back. "Now go and get her. She's waiting for you."

"Alright," Jimmy said, straightening his lapels. "I can do this." And with that, he disappeared through the revolving door of the Planet's front lobby.

Clark wrapped an arm around my shoulder and gave me a quick peck on the cheek. "Was I that nervous?"

"You almost dropped the ring over the railing and you stuttered worse than Porky Pig." I said, standing up on tip toe to kiss him on the lips.

"But I was suave and romantic, too."

I grinned up at him. Much happier now that the focus was off of Chloe. "Sure Clark. You definitely swept me off my feet."

"Being able to defy gravity helps with that."

The phone was ringing again and this time it was four a.m. My heart raced in a way that it hadn't since I'd woken up to Clark's screams five months ago. Quickly, I jumped out of bed and lunged for my cell phone. "Hello?"

"Lana! Oh God." It was Clark and he sounded like he was going to cry.

At that point I felt like my heart was going to just explode out of my chest. "What's wrong?"

"I need you to call Jimmy and Lois and come down to Metropolis General. Chloe's been shot."

Once the three of us arrived to the hospital, we were escorted to the VIP suite of Metropolis General. Obviously that was Lionel's doing. Speaking of the maned menace, he was the first person to greet us when we walked into the private waiting room.

"Mr. Olsen, Ms. Lane, Mrs. Luthor," He said, with a curt nod of his head. Lionel still called me Mrs. Luthor when we were in private. I don't know if he just had something against calling me Lori Lemaris or if he still, after so many years, wanted to remind me of the promise I'd broken, but, either way, he never called me by anything but my married name.

"Lionel," I acknowledged, stepping ahead of the others and shaking his hand. "What's going on?"

"Clark and Chloe were on assignment," He said giving a significant look toward Jimmy and Lois. Obviously we were back to speaking in euphemisms since the other two didn't know what Clark did in his spare time. What he was even capable of. "…and she was shot. The bullet missed her heart, but only by several inches. The second one hit her left lung and caused it to collapse. I'm having the best thoracic surgeons flown in from Duke and Johns Hopkins as we speak. She'll recover, but it's going to take a while."

"Where's Clark?" Lois demanded, clenching and unclenching her fist.

"He's calling Gabe and several other close friends of Chloe's."

"Who else is there to call?" Lois demanded, her nostrils flaring.

I knew the answer, at least partially. Oliver Queen and Chloe were fairly close friends now. He'd arranged for the best private care available for Chloe's mother and paid all her traveling expenses to Star City so that she could visit her mom at least once a month. But telling Lois her ex and her cousin were that close would probably just piss her off further, and she already looked like she was about to kill someone.

"Mr. Luthor, can we see her?" Jimmy chimed in. He was sitting on one of the leather recliners with his shoulders hunched over and his body shaking with every breath.

"Soon, the doctors have to finish stabilizing her and then we'll see."

Jimmy nodded and took a shuddering breath. I walked over to him and placed a hand on his back and started rubbing wide circles in it. It was something Aunt Nell had always done to calm me. I knew he didn't like me, but we both loved Chloe and were overwhelmed with the same fear and sickness. Right now, we were on the same side. I traced geometric patterns on his back for a few more minutes until his breath evened out. Then, I stood back up and made my way over to Lois.

A few minutes later, Clark came back and Lois launched herself at him, aiming an uppercut for his jaw. Like that was going to be a good idea. Clark jumped back a little quicker than a normal human could have, but I had already intercepted Lois's punch and had her trapped in a headlock, which considering our height differences was super awkward. 

"Let me go, Lana. That jerk took my baby cousin out somewhere dangerous and got her shot. I'm going to kill him." She lunged to the side and broke from my initial grasp, but I reached out and yanked her ponytail toward me. She yelled and brought back her arm to elbow me in the nose but she was too tall and I ducked under her arm easily. I grabbed the offending limb and pinned it behind her. Lois struggled in my grasp, almost pulling free of me several times, and cursing in several languages.

So being an army brat really did lead to a colorful vocabulary.

"Enough!" Lionel yelled and I think we all froze. None of us had ever heard Lionel shout in our entire lives. He was just too calm and collected to do that. Anger, after all, was a sign of weakness. Even pseudo-Luthors knew that. "You all are acting like children. Ms. Lane, you are 26 years old, I thought you'd gotten to the point where you didn't solve every problem you had with violence." He sighed. "Mrs. Luthor, let her go." He turned to Lois. "You, Ms. Lane, take Mr. Olsen here and get him a cup of coffee down the hall at the cafeteria. It's going to be a while until he can see Ms. Sullivan and he's going to need something to steal his nerves."

"The Hell I'm going to just leave Chloe like that."

"Ms. Lane, this is a private hospital and I am paying the bills here. If I ask to have you removed from the premises and forcibly kept out, they will do it for me. Please don't make me keep you from your cousin."

Lois narrowed her eyes and for a minute I was afraid she was going to deck him. However, apparently even Lois has better judgment. She walked over to Jimmy's chair and held out her hand for him to take. "Come on, Jimmy, we'll get the biggest cup of black coffee there is. Something warm in your stomach will make you feel better. Promise."

Once they were gone, Lionel turned to Clark. "Come with me, son."

Clark stiffened. He and Lionel had a worse relationship by far than I and Aunt Nell or I and, well, Lionel did. Lionel felt the need to act as a substitute father figure for Clark, and my fiancé resented the Hell out of it. After all, he already had a biological father to contend with and a very beloved adopted father. He didn't need an extra Luthor in his life. "I don't know." He said, casting a glance towards me.

"Mrs. Luthor will be fine." Lionel said stiffly. "We have things to discuss," he added giving Clark the same kind of significant look that he'd given me when we'd been working on covering for Clark. There was something about Chloe I wasn't supposed to hear. I thought back to all the things that hadn't added up about her in the last few years: the "angel" in the subway, the way she'd reminded Clark how she couldn't fix him when he was sick, how she'd been more sensitive about me using the term meteor freak.

Oh, I so had my suspicions and I wasn't about to be shut out this time.

Lionel pulled Clark into a spare exam room, but he didn't realize that there was a second door at the back separated from the other side of the room by a divider curtain. I snuck in. I wasn't worried about Clark catching me either. After three and a half years, I'd even managed to wean him off of using his superhearing. As long as I stayed quiet, neither of them would hear me.

After a few minutes, Clark began. "How is she really?"

"It's not good, Clark. She'll recover---"

"She's self-healing."

"I know and that's the problem. She'll probably be healed in 48 hours and that doesn't happen with gunshot wounds and you know that. That's why I arranged the private room and that's why I've made up the cover story about experimental surgery from Hopkins. Still, she'll have to spend at least three weeks off from work. You know better than I do that no one can know she's meta."

"I know. The keeping her home part is going to be such a pain. I mean, Jimmy and Lois will be able to help, but she hates missing the Planet."

Jimmy and Lois? And that's when I got it. It was like having a bucket of ice water poured down my shirt. Jimmy and Lois knew that Chloe was a meteor mutant who could apparently regenerate from injuries. This huge secret about Chloe, about my best friend, and no one had bothered to tell me. Clark had left me out of the loop big time and I was furious.

"She is one of his best reporters," Clark added, defensively.

"Clark, son---"

"Don't call me that."

"Right, pardon me. Clark then, you can't keep dragging Chloe out with you when you patrol. She was ridiculously lucky this time, and the damage to her left lung was extensive. If she wasn't able to self heal, she'd probably be dead."

"I know that," he said and I swear he could him ruffling his hair out of nervousness. "But you know Chloe. She never backs down from anything. She's knows she can save lives. Hell, she can bring people back from the dead. She's not going to sit at home and cuddle with Jimmy when she can keep people safe. She patrols almost twice as much as I do. Between me and the Angel of Vengeance, we have our hands full making sure Chloe doesn't get herself killed."

Oh my God. My best friend could raise the dead. Now that was a new one. Most meteor mutants were dangerous, but she had a power that could only be used to save others' lives. Still, I wondered how long it would take before she fell victim to catatonia like her mother.

I was betting not too long.

"…admirable job, Clark, but you can't keep her protected forever." Lionel countered.

"Okay, so I know Jimmy's going to kill me for this, but it was Chloe's decision to go out there. It always is. I…I can't tell her not to do it. Having someone dictate how you can use your gifts sucks. It feels like having to go around everyday with you arms tied behind your back." There was a bitterness in his tone that I'd never heard before, and for a second I got the impression that he resented me a little for convincing him to act normal.

Well screw that.

"If it's such a hardship, Clark," I said, pulling back the curtain, "then you and Chloe can run off and be superheroes together."

"Lana?" Clark asked, quirking his head toward me. "How long have you been hiding out here?"

"Long enough to know that you, Lois, Jimmy, and Chloe have been lying to me for a long time. Long enough to know that Chloe's a meteor freak."

"I think you'll find, Mrs. Luthor that the preferred terms are meteor-infected or metahuman." Lionel said stiffly. "If you'll excuse me, Martha and Gabe Sullivan should be arriving soon, and I want to greet them when they arrive."

Translation: he didn't want to be anywhere near me and Clark when we fought.

Once Lionel had slinked out the door, Clark turned back to me. "You spied on us?"

"So?" Even four years later, I had never told Clark how I knew about his powers. He assumed it came from me watching Lex fail to stab him when he was high on red meteor rock. I was never going to tell him that I'd set Chloe up to get the truth. Still, I didn't see the problem in spying, especially when people you were supposed to trust persisted in withholding the truth from you.

He threw his hands up in the air and started pacing. "Eavesdropping wasn't right. Chloe's spent a lot of time trying to keep it a secret."

"Lois and Jimmy and Lionel know." I pointed out, still furious that I wasn't in on their little secret club.

"Chloe saved Lois's life and she only told Jimmy before she agreed to marry him. She didn't feel right accepting unless he knew exactly what he was getting into."

"And he said yes?"

Clark paused and narrowed his eyes at me and I swear I saw the tiniest flash of russet in his eyes. "Why wouldn't he say yes? He loves her."

"Well she's a meteor freak and they tend to go crazy."

Clark clenched his jaw and took a deep breath. "Look, it's early and we're all stressed and scared and I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear that."

I nodded and said nothing. His eyes were still distinctly not green, and I didn't want to make him anymore upset. "And Lionel?"

He rolled his eyes. "Lionel knows everything, but he's made it his personal mission to protect Chloe by helping her fake physicals and that sort of stuff. It's weird, but he has all this respect for her. I think more since she put him in jail, actually."

"Frenemies much?"

He shrugged. "Comes in handy like today. Anyway, they're going to call Lois back in a second to see her and then it'll be Jimmy's turn. Why don't you go and get Lois and then grab some coffee. You could use it."

I nodded and made my way out of the back door, only a little upset that he hadn't bothered to ask how I was holding up with all of this going on.

"Hey," I said, sliding into the table next to Jimmy. I'd already relieved Lois of her Jimmy sitting duty, and it was just the two of us, sitting quietly and waiting to be called in to see Chloe.

"Hi yourself," he replied, taking a sip of his coffee. He looked so pale that his freckles might as well have been neon signs.

"How are you doing?"

"Not so good."

Man, he must have been feeling poorly if he didn't have the energy to snap back at me. "She's going to be fine, you know. I mean, Lionel said her lung was already knitting itself back together."

His head shot up so fast, I had to remind myself that he wasn't a meteor mutant. "You know?"

"I kind of overheard Lionel and Clark talking about her, but I'd suspected it for a while."

He nodded. "All that 'angel of the subway' stuff. That's when I started suspecting. The description sounded just like Chloe. I asked her about it. She denied it, and I let it go. I didn't want to pressure her to tell me anything she wasn't ready to share. I respected her privacy and her space too much to violate her like that."

"I totally understand."

He arched an eyebrow but said nothing for a while. When he finally spoke, his voice was very quiet. "I know about Clark, you know. He gave Chloe permission to tell me about himself when she told me about her powers. I sort of got the crash course history on their superhero antics."

I squelched the hammering of my own heart. "You've known for three weeks and you haven't tried to get a Pulitzer out of it?"

"Photojournalist. Besides," he said shrugging. "He's my best friend. I wouldn't do that to him, and Perry would never print the copy."

This time I spit out my coffee in mid-sip. "Perry knows?"

Jimmy grabbed up a bunch of napkins and started blotting his shirt, his eyes narrowed at me. "Yeah. None of us are quite sure how he figured it out, but he is the best journalist at the best paper in the world and he'd met Clark back in Smallville. Maybe it wasn't that hard."

"How long?" I said, trying to draw in deep breaths.

He shrugged. "Longer than I have. That's for sure. He'd been dropping hints to Chloe for a couple of years, but he hadn't said anything specific to Clark until he got a picture of the Savior of Metropolis and the Angel of the Subway---terrible superhero name by the way, worst ever---in action and refused to publish the exclusive. He had to cash in a gambling I.O.U. from the editor of The Inquisitor to keep the picture from being published there too."

It took a minute for me to be able to breathe again. He'd come that close to being exposed and he hadn't told me. Jimmy and Perry White both knew and he'd never bothered to tell me? What was next? Taking out a public service announcement? Maybe a nice billboard or two? "Why didn't he tell me?"

"Chloe didn't tell me either until Perry left a pretty telling message on our answering machine last week. They didn't want to worry us."

"Still, this lack of full disclosure isn't right."

Jimmy sighed and took another swig of his coffee. "I understand why Chloe didn't tell me about being a meteor mutant earlier. I'd said some things when all that stuff first happened with the moleman farmer about the weirdness of Smallville. I didn't come off as too open-minded."

Clark and I had had several conversations over the years about meteor mutants and the people from the ship before I'd ever known for a fact that he was different. I had said some things, especially about wishing the meteor shower had never happened, that had probably hurt his feelings a lot. I could almost understand why it had taken him so long to be honest with me. 

Almost.

"Jimmy, can I ask you a question?"

"You just did."

"Seriously."

He nodded. "Sure."  
"Why'd you still agree to marry Chloe after you found out that she wasn't normal?" He sat up and stared back at me with disdain, like I'd asked him an easy question like "Why do you breathe in oxygen?"

"I love her."

"But what she is…it doesn't freak you out?"

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a shocked when she told me she had superpowers, but what she can do is really amazing. She saves people's lives. How can I not love her more for that?" And judging from the genuine awe in his voice, I believed that he believed that.

"And you don't ever want her to stop, to just be normal?"

"The way I figure it, she's going to be out risking her neck anyway for the next big story because that's who Chloe is. I'm not happy she's here obviously and I'm super nauseous trying to wait for the doctors' news, but I'm not going to stop her next time. I might lock her in her room for the next month and buy her the nicest Kevlar available or, erm, convince Mrs. Kent to do it, since senators make more money than I do."

"Well that's a healthy perspective."

"I think I'm entitled to freak out a little bit, but I can't keep her home like a pet dog or something. She's too independent for that and that's part of why I fell in love with her."

I nodded. "Still it doesn't bother you that she has, um, abilities?"

He smiled ruefully up at me. "You know you're talking to a guy with an extensive X-men and Warrior Angel collection. She's going to have a hard time trying to convince me not to design a costume for her." He frowned and glanced down at my engagement ring. "What's with the twenty questions? Are you having second thoughts?"

I reached for the ring and spun it around on my finger. It suddenly felt very heavy. "No."

He took another sip of his coffee. "I think you should know that this is off the record. I promise it won't get back to C.K. or even Chloe."

"You don't even like me."

"I don't, but it's only seven a.m. and it has already been one of the longest days of my life. Maybe I'm just feeling charitable, or maybe I'd like to worry about anything other than my problems."

Well it was nice to have someone wanting to listen to my problems for a change. I couldn't talk about all my fears with Clark because I didn't want to hurt his feelings, and Chloe always eyed me like she wanted to roast me alive whenever I brought up how much the alien part of Clark bothered me.

"It's just," I said, twisting my ring again, "I love Clark."

"Well that's pretty obvious."

"But, I mean, it's just---"

"Spit it out, princess. I'm feeling charitable but I still have a hospital bed to sit sentinel over. I did it once before for Chloe and it was an experience I hoped I'd never have to repeat."

Well, Jimmy definitely wasn't getting any less cranky. Clearing my throat, I asked, "Are you going to have kids with Chloe?"

"Not until she wins her first Pulitzer, but yeah, I think I see rugrats in our future."

"But your kids would be different."

He took another sip of his coffee. "And yet they probably wouldn't be mole people, so that's all of the good."

"Jimmy, I'm serious."

"And I'm hyped up on cortisol and adrenaline. I love Chloe more than anything and I want her to be the mother of my children, even if I have a whole brood of little rascals that go around being Florence Nightingale without the nurse training." He frowned and stood up, easily tossing the empty Styrofoam cup into the garbage. "But I have a feeling that you don't really feel that way about Clark."

I crossed my arms over my chest. I was getting really tired of being accused of not loving Clark the way his friends thought I should. "What makes you say that?"

"Even before I knew, there were always these little looks you'd give him, these frowns and things. It's kind of obvious."

"I do love him. It's just I don't know if I want to have kids who can set stuff on fire just be looking at it." I frowned. "Scratch that. I know I don't want to have a bunch of little pyromaniacs running around. I mean, it's not like Chloe's powers are dangerous."

"True enough, but meteor powers often come with mental illness. It could pop back up in the next generation." He shook his head looked me square in the eyes. "But it's a chance I'm willing to take because I'd rather have Chloe in my life than not, no matter what. I think that's the same question you need to ask yourself about Clark before you two crazy kids actually tie the knot."

I spent an hour in the cafeteria sipping half-heartedly on lukewarm coffee, thinking over what Jimmy had said. It was weird, if you had told me four years ago---Hell, four hours ago---that I'd be jealous of Jimmy Olsen, I'd have called you crazy. But now I was. He was able to accept Chloe in a way that I knew, deep down, I'd never be able to accept Clark.

Of course, though mutated, Chloe was still human.

I loved Clark. I just wanted him to be normal. Was that so much to ask?

"Lana?" Clark's soft voice startled me out of my thoughts. "Lois and Jimmy have already been in to see Chloe. If you want to visit her, we can." I stood up and gave him a quick hug and peck on the cheek. He smiled and kissed me back. "Not that I don't appreciate it, but what was that for? We didn't exactly leave everything on the best of terms."

I nodded. "I know, but it's been a really long day."

"Everyone seems to be saying that lately,' Clark quipped. "I wished you hadn't snuck up on me and Lionel."

"Are you mad?"

"Mostly disappointed." I had to stop myself from laughing. It was such a typical Kent answer that I should have been expecting it. "I didn't think you'd resort to spying and I still feel lie you really violated her privacy. Chloe wanted to be able to tell you in her own way when she thought she could. Plus," he said, blushing a little. "I'm kind of embarrassed. No one's snuck up on me in years. If I'd been practicing using my superhearing…" He shook his head. "That's silly. I know I shouldn't use it, and I'm still happy just to have you around. The fact that we're getting married…" he stopped, too choked up to continue.

I smiled broadly at him. "I know, and I do appreciate everything you've done to make me happy, all the little concessions you've made."

He beamed that famous Kent smile at me, "I'd do anything for you."

I squeezed his hand. "I know. That's why I love you." And it was true. Lex had manipulated me into loving him or at least into believing I was in love with him because he'd given me everything I'd ever wanted---the answers about the black ship, honesty when Clark lied, and a plethora of extravagant gifts. I loved Clark, I think, for the same reasons. He didn't have the money to shower me with gifts, but he did anything I asked. There was something just a little intoxicating about having complete control over the most powerful person on Earth, not that I'd ever tell Chloe that.

Now, I'd been "dead" when Chloe'd been in her mysterious coma. However, since I knew about her meteor freak status, I now realized that her illness back then had been due to something that had gone wonky with her powers. She'd been in a coma then for two weeks, and I don't know how Jimmy, Clark, and Lois had survived it. Because just walking into her hospital room and seeing her in intensive care once again was gut-wrenching. The first things that caught my attention when I walked into the room were the thick breathing tube shoved down her throat and the steady drone of the respirator. She was whiter than the freshly bleached sheets covering her and her lips had just the slightest cast of blue to them.

If the heart monitors weren't beeping in the background, I would have sworn she was dead.

"My God."

"Yeah," Clark said, swallowing hard. "It's pretty overwhelming."

And when he said that, I wasn't in this cramped little room any more. No, I was sitting across from Jimmy down in the cafeteria, watching him go through life like a zombie. I was seeing the tears welling in Lois's eyes, which was beyond disturbing because Lois was far too much of a tough girl to cry about anything, and then I saw Clark sprawled out in Chloe's place. I'd watched him die once, even if it hadn't been permanent. I still remembered the shock and the numbness. I knew exactly what Jimmy was feeling right now.

There were already pictures of Clark and Chloe playing at being Warrior Angel. How much longer until even Perry couldn't keep what they'd been doing under wraps? How much longer until some lab actually did get their hands on both of them? Lionel wouldn't be so flustered---a rare occurrence for him---if they hadn't come close already.

"Clark, are you ready yet?"

"The nurse said we could have twenty more minutes."

"No," I said, turning to him. "I meant are you ready to quit all this stupidity. You can't keep running around playing superhero."

"Chloe's going to get better."

"That's not even the point." I said, gesturing to the monitors. "I know Chloe's self-healing, but what happens if she gets shot point blank in the head? Or in the heart? She's not invulnerable, and you're going to get her killed."

"I…I'm not."

"You're the one with the superhearing. Can't you hear how weak and fluttery her heart is? It's because she almost died, Clark. Gabe's rushing from Gotham City to see her. What are you going to say to him? How are you going to explain why Chloe's in the I.C.U.? And what if you two do go out there again like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, are you going to be the one to tell Jimmy that she got killed?"

"I…well…" he floundered.

"And what about me? How do you think I'll feel when it's you?"

He threw his hands up in the air and started pacing. "We already had this conversation. I can't be hurt."

"You're wrong! We're in Metropolis, not Gotham or New York. We're close enough to Smallville for running into Kryptonite to still be a possibility---an outside one, but still---it could happen."

"You're overreacting. Chloe and I have always been careful."

"And that's why the rumors of the Subway Angel and the City Savior have been running rampant through Metropolis for so long that The Inquisitor practically has a page devoted to you two. That's why you had to have Perry call in favors to keep both of you from being exposed to a city of 10 million." He flinched, but I continued. "Yeah, I know about that but I'm willing to bet your mom and Lionel don't. Jesus, Clark. Don't you ever stop and think about anything? I am not going to lose you and I am not coming back to Metropolis General or to an evil science lab or whatever when it's your turn on the slab."

He stopped and wiped off his brow with his palm. It was a borrowed habit, he'd adopted for blending in with humans, just like his insatiable need for morning coffee. Except around Kryptonite, Clark never sweated. "Lana, I tried to explain this to you three years ago, I just can't stop saving people."

"But now you're not saving people, you're putting people in danger, yourself, Chloe."

"Mom and Dad would want me to do what I'm doing, and my…my birth parents too. I just can't turn my back on all of that completely."

I paused, genuinely shocked. Clark never talked about his birth parents if he could avoid it. He had issues with a capital "I" about his biological family. "I'm going to tell you the same thing I told Lex when he got obsessed with the disk he found from the black ship after Zod was banished. Look, I know this is a huge ego killer, but the human race survived just fine for thousands of years without you." I walked over to him and took his chin in my hands, grateful when he turned to face me because, let's be honest here, I'd have better luck jackhammering through concrete with a plastic knitting needle than moving Clark against his will. "Clark, the human race doesn't need you. But I do and Chloe does."

"I don't understand."

"If you just back off of the superhero kick, Chloe probably will too. You egg each other on, and I thought it was pretty much self-evident that I need you. No one appreciates what you do for the city anyway. It's all anonymous. But I care. Every time I fall asleep in your arms or wake up to your smile, I'm glad you're with me. I appreciate you and the rest of us don't."

"Us?"

"Other humans. Come on, just give it up. If you won't do it just for me…" I said, trying very hard not to grit my teeth. I was having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I, alone, wasn't enough reason for Clark to do something. "…then do it for Chloe so you can keep her safe."

He bit his lip and hesitated. "I just can't stop saving people."

I walked over to the bed and smoothed Chloe's bangs away from her forehead. "And you didn't save anyone last night, Clark. Eventually, everybody fails and you failed spectacularly. Just give it up. If you don't, you're going to get Chloe killed and yourself caught. Judging by your close calls lately, you know I'm not just being paranoid."

He swallowed and leaned over Chloe's bed, placing one of his hands over hers. It was so large that it enveloped hers. He tilted his head in that special way of his and I knew that after so many months dormant he'd actually activated his superhearing. "It's so faint."

"I know."

"I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

I put one of my hands over his own. "Then make it stop."

"I don't know how."

"I do." He turned to me and his eyes were red-rimmed and glassy from crying so hard. Maybe I should have been comforting him instead of trying to drag reassurance out of Jimmy. He looked so damn broken. Over Chloe.

That hurt.

"What should I do?"

"Ben Hubbard's lease on the farm is up," I said, giving his hand a squeeze. "Let's go home."


	8. Chapter 8

Part Eight – Dear John

We'd been on the farm for six months, living a blessedly normal and peaceful life. I hadn't wanted to tempt Clark to run off to Metropolis any time there was a "major emergency," so I'd cancelled the farms' subscription to the Planet and the Metropolis Journal (Clark had always liked to keep abreast of what the competing paper was printing). I'd also had him sell the old rabbit-eared TV in the Kents' living room. In fact, the media black-out had gone even further than that. Since the internet service was part of the cable package, once I'd convinced him to get rid of the cable, it was exceedingly easy to get rid of the internet and e-mail as well.

Chloe'd once confessed to me that when she first met Clark, she'd assumed that "farm" meant "Amish." Well now we practically were.

But that was okay. We had each other. I'd taken back over as manager of The Talon, and Clark was busy all day long on the farm. He'd promised me that night in the hospital never to use his powers again, even if it was an emergency, and definitely not for something as mundane as farm chores. Sometimes, I caught him staring longingly at the sky, and I knew in those moments that he was daydreaming about flying. I'd clipped his wings.

But I didn't care.

After all, they clipped parrot's wings to keep them from flying off and hurting themselves. I'd done the same thing. As long as he stayed on the farm he was safe. And normal.

Well, mostly normal. Even I knew that there were limits to pretending. We might have spent most of the last three and half years trying to convince ourselves that he was mostly human, but even our world class denial skills couldn't alter DNA. It was so very quiet on the farm with just us and the cows. (After Chloe's accident, Martha had brought Shelby back with her to live in Washington). We were twenty-six years old, college graduates and settled into our jobs, which, ironically, didn't even require higher education. It was time for the next step. Clark desperately wanted to try for children, and I was running out of excuses.

After all, how often could a girl have a headache?

But other than our disagreement over having children (which technically hadn't evolved into a disagreement yet since I hadn't been honest with him about how I felt about having half-breed children), our life had been idyllic for these last six months, and then Chloe Sullivan had butted back into our lives.

Obviously Chloe was a big part of our lives and always had been. She'd been Clark's best friend and closest confidante since eighth grade, and we'd been as close as sisters back in high school. When we first moved out to the farm only a few weeks after Chloe'd been released from the hospital, Jimmy and Chloe had made a real effort to come out to Smallville to hang out with us. But the first few visits had ended up with Chloe and Clark shouting at each other in the loft while Jimmy and I made awkward small talk. It was obvious what the real purpose of her visits were. She was trying to get him to come back to Metropolis, to go back to saving people.

But Clark had finally accepted where his loyalties lay and he refused to be bullied by her. He wasn't going to leave the farm and, more importantly, he wasn't going to leave me.

And slowly, over the last six months, all of us had grown tired of the argument. The last time we'd had a couples' double date was two months ago. We'd had a night out at The Talon like in the old days, but Chloe had spent it describing the appalling increase in the crime rate in Metropolis and narrowing her eyes in disdain at Clark. She was getting a Hell of a lot less subtle about prodding him.

Not that anyone has ever accused a Sullivan-Lane girl of being subtle.

In fact, neither of us had heard anything from Chloe for almost a month, and then she called two weeks ago begging Clark to speed to Metropolis and stop a monster. She acted like it was life and death that he be there. I mean, they have cops in the city for a reason, and even they didn't the Subway Angel (a.k.a Chloe) and the Angel of Vengeance had marked out Metropolis as their territory. If they were really desperate, I'm sure they could have convinced the Green Arrow or that horrible Batman to come to the city too.

I still firmly believed that people didn't really need Clark.

But she'd called and begged him and, as I listened over the extension, I could tell he was going to cave. So I did what I'd always done---I'd protected him. I set the old mare lose and distracted him long enough to break Chloe's spell, for him to remember that his life was here. I thought that was the end of it, but then the next day, she'd actually come to the farm and yelled at Clark for a good twenty minutes, telling him how ashamed she was of him, and then he'd stormed in here and demanded to go back to Metropolis.

I hadn't wanted him to.

He even tried to convince me that I should go with him, as if I wanted to go to a city torn apart by a monster and help other people out. All I wanted, all I'd ever wanted, was to stay safe here on the farm, just the two of us. I don't know how it escalated from there. After all these years of---well, I wouldn't say controlling Clark---more like carefully nudging him in the right direction, I'd finally snapped and we'd been yelling at each other.

It was so distressing.

Clark never yells at me. He knows how delicate I am.

But we'd fought, and I'd given him the ultimatum of either staying on the farm with me or helping Metropolis, and he'd chosen Metropolis. No, that's not completely right. He'd really chosen her over me.

In retrospect maybe throwing Clark out of his own house hadn't been the best idea.

I thought after the first night that he'd come back to me. After all, by his own admission he'd loved me since he was five. I couldn't imagine him just abandoning two decades of devotion. Yet, the next day came and the next and he didn't come back. Then four days after he'd left the farm, Superman had arrived in Metropolis. I'm sure it was both Chloe's and Jimmy's idea. Chloe came up with the way to make sure no one ever got Clark Kent and the Savior of Metropolis mixed up, and I was sure Jimmy had been the one to come up with the costume angle. I think too much Warrior Angel had seriously rotted his brain.

Still, I believed he'd fly back to me. After all, we were destined to be together. I'd been sure of it. I'd lived in that comforting blanket of denial until this morning, when I'd woken up and found that all of Clark's possessions were gone. He'd obviously flown home and whisked everything away: clothes, toiletries, all of the photos of his parents. Everything.

He'd left me.

And he'd left a note:

"Dear Lana,

I didn't want it end this way. I tried so hard to be the right guy for you, to be as human as you needed me to be, but I can see now that I was wrong. We were wrong. Before you get upset or start blaming her, this has nothing to do with Chloe, not really. She was just the person who gave me the reality check-cum-kick-in-the-ass that I needed. I can't hide on the farm for the rest of my life and pretend to be someone that I'm not. It isn't right. And I can't live my life always afraid that someone is going to find me or take me away. I can't be a coward like that. There are a lot of people who sacrifice themselves and their freedom to keep other people safe, like Whitney and like a lot of my friends. If they're brave enough to live like that, then so am I.  
This isn't even about you, not really. It's about me and who---not what, thank you very much. Chloe, Jimmy, and I have had some very enlightening talks while he was stitching up my costume, and I can barely believe what you actually thought of me---I am. People died because I was playing pretend with you. They died because I let a fantasy get the better of me, and I won't ever let that happen again.

As you can probably guess, I won't be coming back to the farm and I definitely won't be coming back to see you. Please don't come to the city to find me. We have nothing left to say to each other. I will, however, extend the lease on the farm. You can live here as long as you like.

I'm sorry. I just can't do this anymore.

Sincerely,  
Clark"

And that was it. No "forever yours" or "I'll always love you." Just a polite ending, the same as in a letter he'd write to a fourth grade pen pal. I wasn't sure what made me more upset: that he'd left me or that his decision to stay in Metropolis didn't have anything to do with me. It was all about him, about finding himself and his destiny outside of me. What a kick in the teeth. He was looking for his destiny and I wasn't even footnote in it. Angrily, I crumpled the letter and shoved it away into the drawer in my bedside bureau. No one left Lana Lang. I was the one who left, who sent video letters to the Far East or who went all the way to Paris. I was the one who faked her death or found another boyfriend waiting in the wings to comfort me.

Except the impossible had happened.

Someone had left me and he wasn't coming back.

I pulled his pillow to me, and I could still smell the scent of his shampoo and his aftershave on it---never his own scent, of course, because Clark never sweated. Clutching it to my chest, I began to cry, my sobs echoing through the empty house.

I was truly alone now in a way that Clark, despite his alien heritage, had never been, and I only had myself to blame. I'd been selfish. I'd driven him away, and there was no one left to comfort me. There was nothing left. Nothing at all but the empty farm, the slight Indian summer breeze wafting through the window, and the tears running down my cheeks.


	9. Chapter 9

Epilogue – Promise

"What happened to Lana after that, Uncle Errol? Did she ever get Clark back?" An adorable toe-headed girl with bright green eyes and a lumpy teddy bear clutched to her chest asked, staring up at her favorite uncle. Next to her, her younger brother, a willowy boy with bright red freckles, was sucking his thumb.

Errol shook his head and continued with his story. "Lana or, as you might remember from the beginning of the story, Lori Lemaris did not go to Metropolis that day or any other. She knew that there wasn't anything she could say to get Clark back because, deep down, she knew that she couldn't share him with the rest of the world."

"Not like Chloe." The little girl interrupted. "Did Clark and Chloe get together after he moved to the city and became Superman?"

Errol shook his head and the little girl on his lap look like she wanted to cry. "Chloe was very much in love with Jimmy, and the two of them got married." He laughed a little and gave her a quick kiss on the top of her head. "It was a very small wedding, since Clark was the best man for both sides."

"But all the superheroes came," the little boy lisped out around his thumb.

Uncle Errol nodded. "That's right. All the famous ones came: the Green Arrow, Impulse, Aquaman."

"And Batman, don't forget Batman," the little girl added.

He rolled his eyes. "Yes, the entire Justice League came because Chloe---or Watchtower as they called her---was everyone's favorite member and they wanted to see her get married, except for Batman. I think he just came to annoy Clark."

"Then what happened?" The children chorused.

"Like you two haven't heard this story a hundred times before. Jimmy and Chloe got married and lived happily ever after and had two beautiful girls, both as stubborn as their mother, and two little boys, both as loyal and, well, as nerdy as their father. And then," he said, leaning down and tickling both children under their arm pits, "…they had a gaggle of grandchildren cuter than the fluffiest of muppets."

The little boy gasped in a breath and quirked his head. "What's a muppet?"

Uncle Errol sighed. "And now you officially made me feel old."

"On that note," said the children's grandmother, a lively and spry old woman with snow white hair and green eyes as bright as her granddaughter's, "It is time for all little kids to be in bed."

"Aww, Grandma. Uncle Errol was going to tell us about the first costume Chloe ever wore." The little girl protested.

"And then he was going to tell us about why Superman is so much cooler than Batman." The little boy added.

She smirked and shook her head. "I bet he was, but you've heard those stories dozens of times, and…" she said, picking up the little boy and carrying him across the living room to a door decorated with cartoons and doodles of the flying hero in question. "…it is most definitely time for bed." She opened the door and gestured to the dark room behind her. "Come on, Moira, let's go."

Reluctantly, the little girl hopped up. She lingered for a few moments and gave her uncle a big hug, but then she hurried into her grandma's guest bedroom. The harried older woman shut the door behind them, and he could easily hear the quick succession of arguments that followed, from a not-so-gentle-reminder that, no, they could not jump on the bed to an explanation of how there still were no monsters in the closet. Finally, after every stall tactic had been exhausted, the grandmother said goodnight and slipped back through the bedroom door, crossing the room and coming to rest next to him on the sofa.

"You'd think they'd get tired of the same stories every night."

"I think the adventures of Super Chloe make a nice story."

"Thanks, Clark."

"Well it's not like you could tell the stories yourself. That would be immodest."

"And yet my virtue remains intact," Chloe deadpanned with the same dry wit she'd exhibited over the last sixty years he'd known her. "So, Uncle Errol, what did happen to Lana, besides not ever winning Clark back?"

"Oh, Chlo, drop the alias would you? It's bad enough that I let Ollie pick it. Jeez, if I'd known that he was going to set up such a goofy alias, I'd have asked Bruce for help again."

She lifted her chin toward him, feigning indignation. "I think Errol Tell is a fine alias."

"Uh-huh. I like Thomas Fox better."

"Yes, let's not forget those superfun animal names."

"Still, next time, I'm going to ask Dick for help and definitely not Connor. I don't want to be named after the most famous archers in history again." Clark, much as he suspected, had not aged the way humans did and still looked like he was about twenty-five, when in fact he was almost seventy-three years old. You know, assuming that his parents had guestimated his age right to begin with when they'd set up his (fake) birth certificate. Honestly, he wasn't sure how the Hell old he was. If you factored in the theory of relativity and all that speculation on the effects of near light speed travel on aging…well he could be really old. Still, he couldn't be a fifty year old reporter who looked like his own son. It was just a scosh suspicious. So, he'd gone to his rich friends for help. Bruce had handled the counterfeit papers the first time, and Ollie had set him up with a new identity just two years ago.

He still really hated the name.

Even though Perry had offered to conspire with Clark in order to keep him on staff at The Planet, Clark had refused. He'd had no desire to become a traveling correspondent because, at heart, he loved the hustle and bustle of the city in general and the electrifying rhythm of life in Metropolis in specific. Perry had been able to use his connections to get him, erm, Thomas Fox, a job on staff at the Gotham Gazette. Recently, Ollie'd been able to land him a column at the Star City Sentinel. Still, despite whatever city he worked in, it was Metropolis he patrolled.

It was his home and the city he loved.

"Hmm. Head in the clouds again, Boy Scout?"

"No, Watchtower." Off her eye roll, he backpedaled. "Okay, well maybe a little. Anyway, you want to hear the end of the story, don't you?"

She nodded. "I sure do. Will you let me sit on your lap to hear it?"

"Har-har, Chlo."

"Just checking. Oh, and I'm waiting."

"God, you're bossy."

"And it's a good thing I am or you never would have gotten off of your sorry ass."

"That's cold, Chlo, real cold."

"Oh you so know it's true. Anyway, whatever happened to the Pink Princess?"

"Well," he said reaching out his arms and letting her settle into his lap. "Lana or Lori, whichever you prefer, surprisingly inherited the controlling shares in Luthorcorp upon Lionel's death. However, despite her cunning instincts and penchant for manipulation, she had no business sense and Luthorcorp ended up being bought out five years later by Queen Industries."

"And then what happened?"

"Then Lana, who was left penniless, married one rich man after another, but she was never satisfied and she always divorced them and took most of their money."

"It's all about the pre-nup, baby."

"I wouldn't know." Clark had never really dated after Lana, despite Jimmy's misguided efforts to hook him up with Lois, and he'd certainly never been in a position to sign a pre-nup. Reporters just didn't make that much money. Of course, he guessed if he were from California, whomever he married and divorced would have ended up with half the Fortress of Solitude. Joint property state and all that.

"Me neither. Don't get me wrong. Jimmy and I made a nice living, but we weren't exactly the Waynes or anything."

"Right," He said, giving her a quick peck on the top of her head. He had a thing for the crowns of the Sullivan (okay Olsen now) girls. Go figure. "So Lana had five rich husbands and five messy divorces and more than her fair share of stints at Betty Ford."

"And now where is she?"

"Last time I heard she was working on husband number six. I think he's in oil."

"Sounds kind of lonely husband hopping. Do you think she loved any of them?"

Clark tried very hard not to snort. His mother, after all, had taught him to see the best in everybody. However, deep down, he believed that Lana couldn't really love anyone but herself. After some perspective and many rounds of "What the Hell Were You Thinking?" with Jimmy and Chloe, he'd realized that he'd never really loved her either. Sure he'd loved the idea of her, that perfect small town princess he'd placed on a pedestal almost as soon as he'd stepped out of his spaceship, and, moreover, he'd loved the idea of trying to be human. But he'd never loved Lana, not the self-absorbed girl who'd almost convinced him to turn his back on his destiny. And he certainly did not love the girl who manipulated him into letting people die.

"Clark!" Chloe yelled, impatient as always. "I thought we were having a conversation here."

"Oh, right." He shook his head. "I hoped she loved some of them. I didn't want her to be lonely, you know. I just didn't want her to drag me down anymore either."

She nodded. "Can't say I know the feeling. Jimmy, well, he was always supportive."

"I know." He said, giving her a fierce hug. Jimmy had died three years ago, an unexpected heart attack. Chloe'd been crushed. Clark had worried so much about her being alone in Star City that he'd moved here to be with her. It was why he'd had Oliver arrange for his new alias at the Sentinel. Living here, helped him keep an eye on Chloe who, in turn, was dedicated to training all the newbies at JLA headquarters. So the were technically living together in the same house.

And not like that, although he often wished it were that way.

In fact, he'd tried proposing to her once before. It had only been six months ago and Clark felt like he'd waited long enough, felt like his life had been on a serious detour since that terrible train wreck of a moment where he'd walked into the Daily Planet basement and Chloe had hugged him and ditched him to get some Twinkies with Jimmy.

God, he'd wanted to hate Jimmy so much and had been pretty bitter about their whole relationship for a long time. Then Chloe'd almost died after saving Lois and he'd gotten to see how much Jimmy really loved her. Damn it. It was hard to hate a guy so genuinely devoted to her and who was so sweet and, yes, goofy.

Now he knew why Chloe couldn't hold a grudge against him either.

At any rate, his proposal had been kind of half-assed, just a spur of the moment kind of thing. They'd been standing at the kitchen sink, taking turns washing and drying dishes, and he'd just suggested it. At the time it seemed like the most natural thing to say.

Chloe hadn't thought the same thing.

She'd laughed and whacked him with the dishtowel and told him to stop joking around. He hadn't brought it up since and yet…

"Chlo?"

"Mmm?" She asked, raising her head from his chest and yawning. "I know it's getting late but you're so cuddly."

"Thanks. Um," he said, fidgeting with the frayed edge of the sofa arm. "Will you come flying with me?"

She sat up and narrowed her eyes at him. "Clark, who's going to watch the rugrats?"

He gestured to the communicator in his ear. "I have Bart on speed dial."

Her eyes narrowed further. "Who's going to watch Bart?"

"Chlo, it's only going to take an hour. How much trouble can two sleeping kids be for a guy with superspeed?"

"Do you remember how much trouble you had the first time you babysat?"

"Oh, right." Who knew it only took thirty seconds for a three year old to put tin foil in the microwave? "Come on. I have absolute faith in Bart. It's going to be okay."

"Famous last words," she grumbled, standing up and heading to the hall closet to pull out her thickest down coat. 

When they landed in the fortress, Chloe eyed him warily. "I thought we were just doing a night flight. I mean, the coat was for the stupid thin atmosphere, I didn't think we were vacationing up north tonight. By the way, did I mention lately that I hate that you're from an ice planet?"

"Often and loudly, Chlo," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Just saying," she said, plopping down on the large table in the center of the fortress. It was quiet in there tonight and Clark was relieved. There were a lot of days he really hated dealing with his father. After all, Jor-El was almost as bossy as Chloe, although his paternal relationship was much better now that he'd actually gone through and completed his five years of training.

Chloe had been sad to see him go, but, unlike Lana, she'd encouraged him to do it. So he'd done it. And ever since then, the fortress had felt as much like home as the Kent Farm, maybe more so during those few years when Lana had lived there and it had been too awkward to return to Smallville. When he'd come home from training, Chloe had been so overjoyed, she'd baked him a pie.

He kind of wished she hadn't.

Sullivan-Lane girls most assuredly could not cook. It was kind of a miracle her children hadn't starved to death.

"So," Chloe said, swinging her legs under her. "Why exactly are we here?"

Oh jeez. You'd think that after all these years hanging out with her, he'd be all calm and collected this one time. You'd have been wrong. He could feel his palms sweating, which was so weird because he never sweated except around Kryptonite or, apparently, when Chloe made him nervous.

Well he had to give it a try. Mostly because Bart knew exactly what he was planning to do tonight and he'd never live it down if he backed out now.

Slowly, he got down on one knee and pulled out the box he'd been keeping in his pocket for the last six months, ever since he'd decided he'd wanted to do this the right way. He opened up the velvety container and pulled out the ring.

Chloe whistled. "Wow, it's beautiful."

"It was my grandmother's, um, Grandma Kent's"

She smirked at him. "Well I didn't really think it was Kryptonian." She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "Clark, get up. This is stupid."

Most of the time when Chloe bossed him around, she was right, but not this time. He was not going to be deterred; he'd already spent decades screwing this up. "No."

She rolled her eyes. "This is really ridiculous. Come on."

He coughed, okay, so he made himself cough for effect. "Chloe Sullivan, you've been my best friend and my partner for sixty years---"

"Way to make a girl feel wanted. You know how us girls love to be reminded of our age."

"No snark now, come on. This Barry Manilow moment time." He took a deep breath and started again. "Chloe, you've been my best friend and my partner---"

"Now when you say partner are we talking sharing a by-line, crime fighting, or for charades?"

Oh now really. "Damn it, Chlo! Will you marry me?" He snarled out.

She blinked. "Well that was certainly romantic."

"It would have been if you didn't snark your way through everything." He said, holding the ring up closer to her. "Um, technically I could stay like this forever and never have my circulation cut off or anything, but I'd really prefer it if you'd give me an answer."

She swallowed and spoke so quietly that he wouldn't have caught her reply without superhearing. "No."

The answer shocked him so much that he lost his balance and fell over onto his butt. He's proposed five times, once in an alternate time line even, and this was by far his most inauspicious start. And he meant start. He still wasn't ready to admit failure. Blinking up at her, he added, "Um, please?"

"No."

"I don't see what the problem is, Chlo. I love you, you love me. I can promise you that now finally I am not thinking about Lana. If this is about Jimmy, I…I know you miss him, but I don't think he'd mind, really. He'd want you to be happy." Could he sound more clichéd or desperate? Although it wasn't his fault, having Chloe say no had really thrown him off of his game. Tired of being laid out on the ice, he shook the snow off of him and blurred next to her on the table. Chloe didn't even blink. After almost sixty years, she was inured to superspeed.

He should have seen the contrast between her and Lana years ago. When he used his powers in front of her, she acted like it was all natural and was sometimes even awed by them. When he'd used his powers in front of Lana, she'd been afraid.

Not exactly the cornerstone for a successful relationship.

He took her hands in his and slipped the ring on the appropriate finger. She didn't resist, but he didn't take that automatically as a hopeful sign. She'd also long ago learned not to fight him on things because, honestly, it was impossible to physically stop Superman. He could tell she wasn't with him emotionally from the droop of her shoulders and the way she stared at a cropping of ice to her side like it was the most interesting thing she'd ever seen.

"Chlo?" He prodded, putting his fingers under her chin and bringing her eyes (almost) level with his. "How'd I screw it up this time?"

She giggled and the sound was achingly familiar to his ears, just like the girl she'd been. "You didn't. It was sweet bringing me out here to the fortress. I know how much this place means to you. How much it means for you to be able to share your heritage with someone."

"And yet you still said no." He sighed. "You know, after all this time with a girl best friend, you'd think I'd know the first thing about women."

She patted his shoulder sympathetically. "Well, you don't, but on the plus side no guy does. It's not an alien thing, it's a gender thing. You guys are so clueless."

"Gee thanks." He said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and giving her a reassuring squeeze. "So if the fortress was adequately romantic, why'd you say no? It's not Jimmy is it?"

She shook her head. "No, you're right about Jimmy. I mean, about the moving on thing. Even if he could be a little possessive, I don't think he'd mind the two of us being together."

"Then what is it?"

She sighed and bit her lower lip. "I'm going to die."

"Well that's very existential of you, Chlo. We're all going to die." Off her arched eyebrow he added, "Okay, so you're going to probably die sooner than me."

"A lot sooner. I've got a good thirty years tops."

"Thirty?"

"Grandma Sullivan lived to be a hundred and seven and a half. Longevity's genetic, you know."

"Cool. So then you should definitely say yes."

"Yeah because you are really going to want to visit me in the nursing home in like fifteen years."

"Would it be the crooked kind from 'Sixty Minutes' because I love the smell of disinfectant and all you can eat Jell-O is very tempting."

"Now who's being snarky?"

"Chlo," he said, taking her left hand carefully in his and absentmindedly running his fingers over the antique ring. "I don't care. You've known me forever. How many girls have I dated since I broke up with Lana?"

"Diana did sort of flirt with you for a while, and," she added, giggling. "If Jimmy had had his way you and Lois would have been married years ago."

"Oh dear God no." After decades, he'd gotten used to Lois and even considered her one of his closest friends (eventually she, too, had been brought in on the big secret), but whenever he spent any extended amount of time with her, he wanted to strangle her. "Seriously, how many girls did I date, not almost get fixed up with?"

"Um none?"

"Did you ever wonder about that?"

"Well, I kind of figured after you broke up with your dream girl that you might have been gay."

He rolled his eyes. "No matter what the Kat Grant says about the symbolism or lack thereof of my costume, you know that's not true either. Um, not---"

"…that there's anything wrong with that." She finished, smirking. "Seinfeld, oh how we miss thee."

"Pop culture references aside, I'm trying to make a point here. I didn't date anybody else because I was waiting for you. I love you and I don't care how many neophyte superheroine wannabes come on to me at the Watchtower."

Chloe snorted. "In your dreams. You know they're all about Terry."

"What is it that Batman has that I don't?"

"It's that dark mystique. It's just sexier." She patted his shoulder again with her right hand. "Sorry, Boy Scout. You're too straight arrow."

He narrowed his eyes. "You know, I can always take the diamond back."

"No, no. I like it now." She said, winking at him.

'The point is that I want you no matter how wrinkly you get."

"Who says romance is dead?" She deadpanned. "Clark, you know that it's not going to work. We---"

He leaned down then and kissed her long and hard and with more passion than he'd ever kissed Lana, maybe with more passion than he'd kissed her with in the Daily Planet basement all those years ago. Yeah, he loved her and the kiss was romantic. However, he'd also found it was a good way to shut her up.

Pulling away from her, he said. "I. Don't. Care. So we only get twenty good years together. So I have to learn to like eating dinner at the Old County Buffet at four o'clock in the afternoon."

"Gee, you are up on your stereotypes. What about when we play bridge and knit together, too?"

Yeah right. Honestly, it took a concentrated effort by Diana and himself to keep Chloe from sneaking out and fighting crime even now, and she was still contributing on a semi-regular basis to the op-ed column of the Planet. Chloe was not going gently into that good night.

He'd have expected nothing less of her.

He leaned down and kissed her again and neither of them broke apart for a very long time. "So, is it a 'yes?'"

She nodded, grinning her patented wide grin. "It's a yes."

"So," he said, scooping her up and preparing to take off (he'd long since become a proficient enough flier that he could soar to the fortress almost as fast as the portal in the caves could teleport him), "How did the proposal rate on a scale of one to ten?"

"About an eight. I still think Jimmy's was better."

"I planned that."

"I know. At the wake, Lois told me about the jumbo-tron nightmare I just barely escaped." She quirked her head at him. "How would you rate your Paris extravaganza?"  
"About a two. Lana loved it, but it just wasn't me. It was too fancy. Besides," he said looking away, "I really wanted to propose here like I did on the day of the election. It just feels right here."

Chloe nodded and clutched his shoulders tightly as he took off into the night. After a moment of getting her bearings, she continued on with the conversation as if she weren't soaring thousands of feet above the ground. That was Chloe for you. She dealt with weird as if it were an everyday occurrence, which, granted, in the League it was. It was the mundane she detested. And mocked. "You know what's funny?"

"What?"

"I planned your proposal to Lana, and you planned mine to Jimmy."

"Hey that's right."

"It's like our subconscious was already telling us to go ahead and tie the knot, but it took the rest of us too long to catch up."

"Tell me about it."

She snuggled deeper into his chest and he reveled in the feel of her body. "I really did love Jimmy, you know."

"I do and it's okay." And even now it still hurt to think about Chloe loving someone else beside him, and, yeah, he knew that made him sound egotistical, but she'd always been his girl, even if neither of them had realized it.

She sniffed a little and was quiet for part of their trip, but she finally spoke somewhere over the Dakotas, "You know what I regret?"

"That phase back in the early '10s where you died your hair red?"

"Well there is that." She sighed. "Stupid photographic memory. You never let me forget anything."

"Yeah, I know."

"Anyway, I was saying that I'm sorry you never got to have any kids of your own. I see the way you are with all of mine, and you would have been a wonderful father." God, that was one of his biggest regrets too. Not that he apparently wouldn't have plenty of time to get to it, just not with her. Echoing his thoughts, she continued, "I'm just sorry that I won't…well you know."

"It's okay. I don't think the world could take a bunch of half-Kryptonians with snark as a superpower. It would doom civilization as we know it."  
She laughed. "You're probably right." And then she smirked up at him in a way that reminded him eerily of Lois and terrified him to his very core. "Speaking of snark, maybe we're jumping to the wrong conclusion. Maybe it's the guy Kryptonians who have the babies."

"Oh God. I am not hearing this."

"Seriously, we should check that out with the A.I. next time you drag me up north to freeze my ass off. I mean, who knows, maybe you could have a whole litter."

"Aw, Chlo."

Maybe asking her to marry him had been a mistake after all.


End file.
